I feel myself relax, breath audibly whooshing out of my tight lungs. “Well, aren’t you the little mathematician.”
He gives me a withering look, and I hold up my hands.
“Sorry. Yes. Me and Eva.” I hope. I wish. My eyes drift toward her window again.
“That’s cool,” he says, nodding. And I don’t know if it actually is cool to him—?he’s a teenage dude, and it doesn’t seem all that unlikely that he might get weird or maybe a little judgey or, hell, even excited when a girl who used to like him now likes a girl—?but for now, I’m happy to take him at his word.
“What, no threesome jokes?” I ask.
“Oh, I’ve already made plenty in my head, trust me.”
I laugh. “I have no doubt.”
“You still think I’m hot, right?”
“Oh my god.”
He laughs, but it fades quickly. “For real, though. You all right?”
I bite my lip, rolling his question over and over again in my head. “I think I will be.”
“Okay, then.”
“Okay.”
“See you ’round?”
I nod. “Yeah. Thanks, Jay.”
And then I get out of his car and he drives away. I’m left staring at a dark house—?my house, for all intents and purposes—?and it feels just like coming home.
Emmy answers the door dressed in a tank top and a pair of blue-and-yellow-plaid pajama bottoms, her hair a sleep-tossed mess. She takes one look at my tear-ruined face and the suitcase in my hand before she releases a long sigh, like she’s been holding that breath for years. Maybe she has. Maybe we all have. Then she smiles a sad smile—?part relief, part heartbreak—?and pulls me into her arms.
Chapter Thirty-One
THERE’S NO SIGN OF EVA, BUT LUCA MUST HAVE HEARD my soft knock. He comes into the living room just a few seconds after Emmy lets me in, clad in green pajama bottoms and a LuMac’s T-shirt.
“Where the hell have you been?” he asks, but he doesn’t wait for an answer before he yanks me into a hug and gives me a soft noogie.
“I’m sorry,” I say into his shirt. Then I lift my head and meet Emmy’s gaze. “How’s Eva? Is she okay?”
Emmy nods. “Physically, yes.”
“I’m really so sorr—?”
She holds up her hand. “Don’t. You and Eva might have some things you need to work out between you, but nothing about that car accident was your fault. Do you understand me?”
I press my eyes closed and take a deep breath before I nod.
She steps closer. “Do you understand me?”
I keep my eyes open. “Yes.”
“All right.”
Emmy gets me a glass of water and some tissues, and the three of us settle on the couch. I rest my head on Emmy’s shoulder, and Luca’s head rests against mine. We’re like a little domino train half tipped over.
And then I tell them everything that happened with Mom.
