I released a bark of laughter. “Get out!”
He sat up and ran a hand through his hair. Hair so thick I imagined combs shattered upon touch. “You are! You’re like that cranky man who yells at children but then secretly mends their shoes.”
“What!”I couldn’t stop laughing.
“You’re…” he paused. “You’re all tough candy shell. When inside—”
“I’m oozy chocolate? Please.”
Instead of responding, he leaned over, pulling me in so closethat our eyelashes practically touched. His lips grazed my jaw and then moved up toward my ear. “Yeah, chocolate. Melted.”
Every bone in my body turned into liquid as I turned my lips to his. He cradled my head gently and kissed me softly. And then. Then he said, “I love you.”
I stilled. My blood stopped coursing through my veins, my heart froze midbeat, my cells were suspended. I couldn’t move.
Uncertainty passed over his face, his eyes still on mine. When I didn’t react, he moved back a little, his body no longer touching mine.
Hamlet loves me. Hamlet LOVES me? Hamlet loves ME?My brain was malfunctioning, wires being crossed, indecipherable signals being passed back and forth, and I couldn’t speak. I didn’t know what to say.
“Don’t letmeinterrupt.”
Both of our heads swiveled to see Hamlet’s grandma holding a tray of fruit in front of the TV. His grandpa was right behind, with a giant bowl of popcorn.
Hamlet blushed. “We were just—”
“Give me a break,” his grandmother grumbled as she tottered back over to the sofa, walking between us and plopping herself down, the tray rattling on her lap. She glanced over at me. “This one is a bad influence, huh?”
I stammered, “What, why…”
“Eat some fruit. Cool off,” she said, shoving the tray onto the coffee table in front of us. We both reached for the tiny forkspoked into the pears and ate silently, not making eye contact with each other while the video game started up again.
***
That night, I looked through some old photos of Felix and me from when we dated. There was one of us hanging out in some parking lot. Felix with his arm draped lazily around me, both of us smiling in the harsh glare of the lights. I didn’t remember that day, because days with Felix and Patrick always ran together into one indistinct blur.
Felix never said he loved me. Even though we cared for each other, and still did, it never got to that level. We liked a lot of the same things and were attracted to each other at the time. But Felix didn’t dig past a certain depth, and neither did I. Hamlet, though? He was fearless in his digging, in his pursuit of something more meaningful.
Looking at these photos with Felix was bittersweet. The chasm between us from the water-park incident felt unbridgeable, and I wondered if Patrick was right. Were they being replaced?
I texted Patrick and Felix:How are you guys?
The conversation bubbles were immediate. But took forever. I frowned. It wasn’t like them to take that much time drafting texts to me.
Patrick replied first:Good. I requested a child’s neon green cast.
I laughed.
Felix replied soon after:Okay. My parents are being over the top and keep checking up on me in the middle of the night to make sure I haven’t died.
I texted back:Do they know you’re past the danger zone??
They think Jesus was punishing them for letting me date you.
The laughter felt good, and for just one evening, it was like old times.
CHAPTER 25
WHAT
