The event she’s talking about is a casual evening out during which students get to ask questions about life as a scientist, grad school, and making it in academia. I think back to the moment when I signed up to mentor a session, wondering if I qualified since I hadn’t yet made it in academia, with my grant pending and the persistent worry that I might not even have a job a few months from now.
“Which is unfortunate,” Vivienne continues. “I need to do a bit of juggling now to get a new place booked for you, but there’s space at the bar I booked for Lewis, so I was wondering if you’d be fine joining him? I normally wouldn’t do this, but obviously you’re dating, and a lot of students requested to speakto both of you in their forms anyway, so it might even be a good opportunity for them.”
Well, shoot. Vivienne and Brady both wait for my reply, oblivious to the fact that they’re adding two, maybe three, hours of Lewis to a system that’s already near the breaking point.
I put my new plan in motion this morning when I told him to head to campus without me, but instead of enjoying the few extra hours in bed after the many late nights, I lay there, nearly spraining my thumb by updating my inbox for (still absent) grant updates. I have yet to see him this morning, and my anticipation is building like a tidal wave that will not be helped by additional hours with him tomorrow night, but I don’t have another option. I guess I’m signing up to spend more time with the person I desperately need time away from.
“You can put our sessions together,” I tell Vivienne.
She breaks into a smile. “Super. I’ll email you the details later!”
“Golgi, she’s so nice, isn’t she?” Brady says, watching Vivienne walk away. “I thought it was fake at first, but she’s always this kind. We work together on this massively complicated project I’m heading. It involves a ton of different hospital departments back in BC, plus collaborators around the world, and she always does more than she needs to, just to take some work off my plate.”
Though I haven’t known Vivienne that long, her questions about Lewis, commiserations about long-distance relationships, and her effort to let me spend more time with him all seem so genuine. I can only hope Jacob has learned from his mistakes and values her kindness, too.
Brady heads off to the bathroom, while I look for Lewis to tell him about the change of plans and to see how he’s doing ahead of his lecture. As excited as I was about having run intoRosanna Alderkamp, that giddy feeling has died down now that I know I’ll have to figure out how to spend an extra few hours with Lewis tomorrow. I find him in the empty auditorium, a lone figure at the lectern getting ready for his lecture. For a moment, I watch him through the window panel of the closed door, ignoring how my heart squeezes in on itself. While he scrolls through the slides, his other hand alternates between fumbling with the lapel of his jacket, the laser pointer, and the back of his neck. The giant projections flip behind him, from the squiggly lines of a hippocampal ripple, to the pink and wrinkly surface of an exposed brain, and a black-and-white diagram I recognize from his latest commentary. When he seems to be done, I push the door open and his head snaps up.
“I see you got rid of your not-so-brief introduction to psychology. Flashy suits you,” I tease, pausing in the doorframe.
“What can I say. I’ve had some last-minute help from the best,” he responds as one corner of his mouth tugs up.
My smile feels inevitable. “I hope you’re not sick of me yet.”
He watches me as I cross the floor toward him, and I’m surprised my body doesn’t short-circuit. “Hardly.”
“Because Vivienne just put the two of us into the same Q and A session tomorrow.”
“Okay,” he simply says, still staring. Something must be weird with my face, although it looked fine in the bathroom mirror.
“How are you feeling about your lecture?” I ask, patting my cheek self-consciously. A wooden plank creaks under my shoe, echoing in the quiet.
“Good, I think. Definitely better after you helped me yesterday. Hey, these are new,” Lewis notes when I reach his side. He brushes a strand of my hair aside to tap the frame of my glasses, which I guess I’m wearing for the first time in his presence today.
“Yeah, turns out that late nights and all that wind are not great for my eyes.” It’s a bit of an understatement. My eyes feel dry and gritty, like someone’s scrubbed them with sandpaper, and though it’s only been a half hour, I already feel the urge to apply eye drops again.
“They look good on you. Although…” He plucks the glasses off my nose, the world around me turning blurry. “Hold on.”
I can just about make out the shape of Lewis tugging up a corner of his shirt, revealing a caramel-colored blob that must be the skin of his stomach.
“What are you doing?” I’m not sure if I’m more annoyed at Lewis for stealing my glasses or at my crappy eyesight for keeping me from getting a good look at Lewis’s torso. Then I realize what he’s doing. “Are you cleaning my glasses?”
“Just making sure you can see my lecture okay,” he teases. He holds the glasses up to his eyes. “I’m surprised you made it here without walking into a wall.”
“I could see fine, thank you very much. Unlike now.”
He greets someone over my shoulder, then steps closer, his facial features sharpening in the process. I can finally see the cocky grin on his face, the tiny freckles on the bridge of his nose.
“Better?” he asks, his breath warm against my forehead.
He’s standing close enough that I wouldn’t even have to step forward to kiss him. Which I won’t, obviously. Humankind didn’t decode the genome by giving into its each and every impulse, so I won’t, either.
“Well?”
“A bit,” I tell him, my voice coming out all croaky.
“Good, I wasn’t sure if you were far- or nearsighted.”
As Lewis slides the glasses back onto my nose, the world shifts back into focus in a dizzying flash. His knuckles brush mytemples, and a prickle spreads over my skin where he touches it. “Here you go.”
