When I don’t laugh with him, he shifts so he can face me head-on. “So, fucking tell us already,” he says to me, his mouth twisting in a frown. “What the hell’s going on?”
Not sure how much Jenson and Olivia know, I lay out my cards bluntly.
“Her name’s Leleila,” I say as I clench my hands around the hot cup of tea. “I met her twelve years ago at a party and haven’t seen her since. Not until she walked into her sister’s store. She’s engaged, and her wedding’s in less than two weeks.”
Jenson raises a blond eyebrow. “That’s not simple.”
“No. I don’t know him so I shouldn’t be making snap judgments, but I’m pretty sure her fiancé’s an asshole. Treats her like crap. And Leleila’s become my best friend.” I’m just getting started. “She’s free to pretty much do whatever she wants until the wedding. He’s not around, and he’s not planning to be, not until he’s put a ring on her finger and can control her life from there on out.”
“Wait a minute.” Cam raises a hand to stop me. “When you say she can do whatever she wants, you mean…”
“Not everything,” I clarify. “Not anything like you’re thinking, so you can pull your dirty mind out of the fucking gutter.”
Cam chuckles.
“But outside of that, everything’s on the table with this woman, meaning she’s free all the time to hang out.” I let out a frustrated groan. “Which is weird for me because what started out as friends has turned into me craving her. And she’s engaged. So that makes me an ass.”
“You’re so the opposite of an ass, Bray.” Cam’s tone leaves no room for argument.
“But wanting her is wrong. I wasn’t raised that way. Except I don’t fucking know how to stop things between us, other than to just walk away from her. And something tells me that would crush her. She’s lonely, and her relationship with her fiancé, from the little I’ve heard, sounds shitty. You guys are happily engaged; what do you think?” I run my hand down my face and turn to Jenson and Olivia.
Jenson and Olivia look at each other. “Obviously, we can relate,” Jenson says to me. “Feeling wrong for the way you feel; knowing you’ll never find someone who measures up but thinking she’s forbidden.”
“Ah, forbidden love.” Olivia’s tone holds a twinge of bitterness and a fair amount of regret. “I let the rules of others control me for far too long. My father being the mayor, the town’s judgment—it nearly undid me to be frank.”
“Your relationship didn’t have a third person involved, though,” Cam says. “How is Bray supposed to handle that?”
“Sounds like you’re conflicted about more than morals.” Jenson taps the counter, and I glance at him. “From the look in your eyes, I’d say you’re also flipping over what you know you’ll be losing in two weeks. So you’re holding back on telling this woman how you feel.”
“You’re saying you think I should bare my soul to a woman who’s engaged to another man.”
“I’m saying don’t let her go without a fucking fight, yes.” Jenson’s tone is certain. “If she’s spending this much time with you rather than him, there’s a problem in her relationship that she’s either not facing, afraid to acknowledge, or she’s just plain scared to cut bait. Sounds like her fiancé is fairly controlling.”
“She was young when she met him, only sixteen.”And it was after an event that terrorized her, so she was no doubt looking for a lifeline. Someone safe to hold onto.
But I can’t say any of that to them.
Cam exhales. “Getting out of a high school relationship can be tough, man.”
Cam’s teenage girlfriend wasn’t the one for him as an adult. Didn’t stop her from hanging on long after it should have ended. And their parents’ determination to keep them together made it harder.
“This isn’t the same,” I say. “This guy’s not chasing her around. He’s giving her all the space in the world.”
“Except maybe she doesn’t feel that way,” Olivia says. “She may feel like she has to keep doing what he says and playing by his rules.”
“That is how we got into this,” I say slowly. “He strongly suggested she ask me to be her dance partner because he was too busy to go to class with her.”
“Real attentive guy she’s got there,” Jenson says sarcastically. “Just take stock of all of it. Don’t miss something because you’re too busy overthinking what’s right or what’s wrong. She may need to figure this out on her own.”
“I get it. That’s why I keep backing up. I don’t ever want Leleila to feel pressured or pushed.”
And I don’t want to be hurt.
But I’m pretty sure my world will come crashing down to rubble the moment Leleila and I can’t be friends anymore.
“My advice?” Jenson says. “Even though you didn’t ask, I would keep fighting for her. You don’t want to wake up in two weeks and wish you’d done something more. Maybe she needs a reason to tell him goodbye.”
Olivia wraps her arm around Jenson’s waist and smiles at me fondly. “A handsome, muscular blond reason with bright blue eyes and a big heart.”
