Half-wishing I hadn’t blurted that out, I open my menu. Rib-eyed steak and potato. That sounds so good. And it’s a special tonight, which means it’s within my price range.
The waiter comes over, and Brayden and I each order a steak special for dinner. I’m relieved that I can feel my slight buzz wearing off already even though I haven’t eaten yet. Just leaving the bar seems to have sobered me up. And I’ve always loved steak. Phillip only eats red meat on occasion; I’ve learned to seriously curb my carnivore tendencies since we moved in together.
“I’ve been wanting to try this place,” I say to Brayden. “Thanks for suggesting it.”
“Sure. I saw it as soon as it opened, but I never had an occasion to eat here.”
I take a sip of my water.
“Leleila,” Brayden says in a careful tone. “We need to talk.”
I keep hold of the water glass in my hand, staring down at the clear liquid. “That’s the first time I’ve seen him since I was sixteen,” I say quietly. “I’m sorry you were there.”
“I’m not,” he says. “But I hate seeing you upset. I want to help.”
“I know he can’t hurt me,” I say. “I just don’t want to dredge up old memories. He got kicked out of school shortly after the party and left town to go to a private school somewhere in Colorado. Then he played football for a big college in the south and even made the pros.” I raise my gaze to meet his. “After it happened, but before he got kicked out, I went to the school counselor and told her I was going to report him.”
“Let me guess.” Brayden’s blue eyes darken angrily. “She advised you not to. Said his football career would be over, and what happened wasn’t really that bad.”
I inhale. “That’s scary how close to the mark you are. She said nearly those exact same words. She added thatmyreputation would be ruined; that it didn’t matter what he did or did not do; no one would believe me. And without any evidence…”
Brayden reaches over and drops his warm, heavy hand over mine. Tears clog my throat, and I fight them back.
“I was a kid,” I say with a shrug that I hope deflects from how affected I am. “I believed her. I like to think that as an adult, I wouldn’t listen to her. But the fact is that in court, my story probably wouldn’t hold up. I had no witnesses to what went on inside that bedroom.”
“I saw…” Brayden starts to say.
But I shake my head. “You saw a guy knocked on the floor. Sure, I had a cut on my cheek, but he could have claimed self-defense. He could have claimed anything at all, and without an eyewitness, it would have been my word against his. Maybe if I’d gone to the police straightaway, but even then…” I pause. “Noah has a lot of connections in this town. To the PD, to the mayor, you name it. His family’s been around for generations.”
Brayden rubs my hand. “I’m sorry you had to see him tonight.”
“I was lucky,” I say honestly. “I escaped, and he disappeared from my life. Him being expelled from school for dealing drugs felt like nothing short of a miracle. He’s one of those guys who always seemed like he could get away with anything.”
Something flickers behind Brayden’s eyes.
I open my mouth to ask him what he’s thinking, but before I can, the server comes by with our meals.
And we both settle in to eat.
Eating is a nice respite from the heavy conversation, and the steak is delicious. The tension from running into Noah starts to subside, and I smile at Brayden.
“So what happened with your plans?” he asks me in a curious tone. “The PhD and all?”
I tell him about my data, about how Gerry said my heart wasn’t in it, how I thought it was perfectly clear, and how Phillip swore up and down that I’d pass for sure.
“It sounds dumb when I talk about it out loud like this,” I say. “It’s not life and death, and I’m beyond lucky to have had the opportunity at all. It’s just a diploma, but for some reason, it felt like my whole future rested on it, like Phillip and I wouldn’t…” I trail off before I finish the sentence with,“like Phillip and I wouldn’t make it if I failed.”
Brayden clears his throat and shifts direction. “So you had big plans once you got your degree? You’re gonna save the world, too—make your parents proud?”
I take a bite of steak and look away from him as I chew it. “I used to think so. But right now, I’d be happy just having a clear plan of what to do next.”
“Maybe you’re too focused on the PhD,” Brayden suggests as he finishes his meal. “You should do something you enjoy for a bit and see what happens.”
“You enjoy working on the ranch? And coaching football?”
“I don’t want to do anything else,” he says. “What about you? You have a talent for painting for sure.”
I tell him acrylics and oils were always my favorites. “But when I went to Montana Art Supplies and purchased supplies for Big Sky Grocer, I thought maybe I’d get some paints for myself so I could work at home. It was so overwhelming I just walked out.”
