Clearly, he can feel me shaking.
I’ve seen Brayden Wild three times in my life now, and all three times, I’ve ended up in his arms.
I catch my breath as I feel his chest against mine. My heart starts to beat faster, and maybe I’m mistaken, but it feels like his does too.
I swallow and pull away from him as June smirks. “I’m good,” I say quickly. “Sorry about my clumsiness.”
“No apology needed.”
I give him a quick wave before turning to walk through the store doors. My advisor is just ahead of me at the prepared food section.
“Gerry!” I call out as I walk toward him.
“Leleila,” he says politely, a boxed sandwich in his hand. “Hello. How are you today?” He speaks to me in the measured tone one would use with someone who’s not quite stable.
“I’m fine,” I say breathlessly. “Look, I’m sorry to have called last night, but I really would like to ask you to reconsider. I know you don’t think I’m ready to try again, but I think you’re wrong, and here’s why.” I exhale and begin the speech I’d prepared in my head on the way to the store this morning. “My data is groundbreaking. There was nothing else like it at the Psychophysiological Conference last year. You said so yourself.”
“Leleila,” he says again. “We’ve already been over this.”
“But, Gerry,” I plead. “Dr. Schneider. Please, will you try to talk to the panel about moving up my second try? A year is too far away.”
Brayden passes by us with the ladder under one arm just as Gerry says, “Why is a year too far away? I understand it’s very difficult to have to wait when you’ve put your whole life into this, but I can’t see your heart broken twice in one year. And that’s what I’m afraid will happen if you rush into this. You need to work on your data, not just regurgitate the same old stuff. And I’m happy to help, but I want you to take some time away to get a clear head.”
“But…”
He sighs. “I fought for you. I really did.”
“Gerry, I’m the best candidate for the psychology professor opening. Professor Andle had all but promised me the job. And I’m still supposed to go to Africa with Phillip, so I’m running out of time to find employment first.”
I argue with him for the next five minutes, telling him I want to continue my research with children in Africa, and I can’t do that if I don’t have the credentials, but it’s all in vain.
“Let’s go to lunch sometime,” he suggests. “And talk about your thoughts on your thesis and your life outside the lab. I’ll see you soon.”
I watch him walk away then I bite my lip and stare down at the boxed sandwiches in front of me. I bet they won’t have boxed sandwiches in Africa. I bet they won’t have much at all, especially if you have absolutely no purpose whatsoever for being there.
I hear a noise at my side, and I look over to see Brayden putting fresh salads into the shelf next to the sandwiches.
“So you want to go to Africa?” he says as he continues to stock the shelves.
I shrug. “If all works out, I will be going to Africa. Do I want to? You’re actually the first person who’s asked me that question.”
Brayden shifts so he’s facing me, his blue eyes clear and attentive. “And what’s the answer?”
I swallow. I don’t know what it is about this man that’s always made me feel so exposed, so…raw.
“I’ll be back in a bit. I have a quick errand.”
“See you, Leleila.” His deep voice sends shivers down my spine.
I hustle out of the store and hop into my car. I know where I’m going, but I’ve never actually stepped foot inside. Three blocks down, I turn left onto Front Street and see the small sign in front of the store window.
Montana Art Supplies.I throw on my signal at the last second and jerk the wheel to the right to pull into the cramped parking lot. The car behind me honks angrily, and I curse under my breath as I park in the far corner of the lot and step out.
A bell goes off when I pass through the door of the store, but nobody even glances my way. A couple of high school kids are running the registers, and the lines are pretty long. I hurry toward the paint section and grab what I’ll need for June’s sign and potential mural. And then, I linger in the aisle.
I had a passion for painting when I was young, and I kept at it through high school. But my parents were never fans of me focusing on art as a career. And after what happened with Noah at the party, I started to think they were right about everything. So I gradually turned away from it, and in college, I threw all of my energy into my studies.
“Can I help you?”
