“I didn’t know you two were dating until after the Climax game,” he says, and from the look in his eyes, I know he’s telling the truth. “I just thought you could convince him, especially once I found out he was with the Cannons on a one-year deal.”
“But then you blabbed on us to Craig. Did you really think that would be successful?”
Daddy stares down at his hot chocolate. “Craig’s an idiot. I had to try it.”
“You never think of anyone but yourself,” I say softly.
“Bullshit,” he says. “You and Wild moving to Colorado would benefit all of us.”
“Did it benefit all of us when you bailed on our family?” I ask him.
Daddy slowly turns his gaze to meet mine. Ten seconds pass as we study each other in silence.
“I’m flying home tomorrow morning, Daddy. Working for you isn’t an option for me. Not anymore.”
“I’m assuming it’s because Wild won’t come and you can’t leave your boyfriend?” His eyes turn cold and empty. “I guess you let him control you, huh?”
I look back at him calmly. “No, Daddy. That was you I let do that.”
His eyes focus on me more intensely. “You’re different, Vannah. More grown up. Not just because it’s been six years, but something else.”
I take a deep breath. “Yes. I am. And I have something I want to read to you. Since you never answered any of my letters, maybe if I read this one to your face, you’ll choose to respond.” I open up my phone and tap on the letter I’ve been working on since I arrived here, the one I stayed up late last night to write and rewrite until I was sure I had it right. I didn’t show it to Cam; I didn’t tell anyone else what I was doing because I never knew if I’d have the guts to read it aloud.
I clear my throat.
My voice shakes and my hand holding the phone trembles, but I keep my eyes on the screen and start reading.
“It wasn’t my fault what happened with Watts. It wasn’t my fault the Cannons lost the game that night. You made me think it was, and I paid a price for your betrayal for a long time. I paid while you went off to Colorado and started a new family. Eventually, I learned that you aren’t my hero. You’re just a man with flaws like everyone else. It’s taken me a long time to accept this. And the ‘go fuck yourself’ that you liked to throw around? That hurt. So much. But despite how terribly cruel and unforgivable that is to say to anyone, let alone a child, I had to figure out a way to heal.” I pause. “So I’ll say this to you, Daddy, because you’re my father and I love you—‘Go love yourself.’ It’s the best thing you could ever do for me.”
When I finish, the café is so quiet I could hear a pin drop. It’s almost like a moment of silence for the dead. I lower my phone and put it away in my purse.
“I only wanted the best for you.” My father’s voice is gruff. “I never meant to hurt anybody.”
“Words hurt,” I say simply. “They may not be a fist to the face like your father did to you, but they hurt all the same. And they last. Try to remember that with your new baby, okay?”
“I still have all your letters. I still read them from time to time.” He takes a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Vannah. Watts wasn’t your fault. Neither was the loss.” He shakes his head. “I want to be a better man—and husband and father.”
“Go see the therapist I told Flora about,” I say as I stand up to go. “Don’t lose this family the way you lost us.”
And when we say good-bye this time?
Everything’s different.
“I’ll be going then.”
I give him a quick kiss, and then I grab my bag and walk out of the café.
Chapter Thirty
I climb onto the team bus and head straight for Cam. He pats the empty seat next to him.
I can’t believe how good it is to see him. His facial scruff is thicker than usual, which just turns me on more. His hair’s messy in the best way, and his dark eyes fix on me like lasers as I sit down.
We don’t talk much on the ride, but he holds my hand and I lean my head on his shoulder. When we reach the hotel where we’ll stay for a few hours until our flight is ready, Cam takes me up to his room without a word.
“I’m leaving the rink,” he says to me. “All the fights on the ice, and with my dad. And I don’t want to argue with you as a substitute.”
I reach for him as we sit down on the bed. “Me neither. I’m sorry.”
