My body shook as I cried harder. I didn’t care about my makeup, the show, nothing. I was mentally and emotionally tired, and it was starting to affect me physically. The last thing I wanted to do was go on that stage and sing, but I was going to give my fans the show they’d paid for—the show they deserved.
Falcon waited until I was all cried out to use the towel on the vanity and wipe my face.
“What did I tell you about your life? Your career?” he asked softly before placing a tender kiss to my neck. “Hmm?”
Sniffling, I released a long exhale. “That I can’t live for him. I have to live for myself. That life is short, but it’s too long to be miserable.”
“I know that’s ya pops, but if you don’t like the way he talks to and treats you, cut him off. I know you’re softhearted, so if you want to talk to him about it first, do that. If he can’t or is unwilling to understand and change, cut that mane outta your life. I don’t give a fuck who it is. You don’t let nobody treat you a way you’re uncomfortable with.
“You’re not a second son to him; you’re his daughter. If he can’t treat you the way you want to be treated, remove his access to you. Being in your life is a blessing. If he doesn’t appreciate it, cut him off.” I nodded as my eyes dried. “And if you wanna stop doing music, stop doing music. Just do it for your pleasure again. Open your bookstore, have someone build your tree house, and live the life you want to live, bae. Please.”
Cupping the back of his neck, I rested my forehead against his. “I love you, and I’m so grateful for you, Falcon. Thank you.”
“I got you always. Regardless of how things play out between us this fall, I will always be here for you, aight?”
I nodded as a light tap against the door sounded. It was Andrew letting me know it was almost time for me to head out. With only five minutes to spare, I looked my face over, grateful that my makeup hadn’t budged. After fluffing out my curls, I was about to reapply my lip gloss, but Falcon covered my hand and stopped me.
“Wait. Let me get a kiss first.”
His request made me smile for the first time in I didn’t know how long. I happily obliged before reapplying my lip gloss and heading out. With Falcon holding my hand, I passed the VIP room and noticed my brother and father were gone. Knowing they were already seated in the audience was enough to make me anxious all over again, but with Falcon by my side, it didn’t bother me as much. No man had ever stood up for me like that, mostly because they were too infatuated with my brother and wanted to stay in his good graces. Falcon’s actions showed me that maybe . . . just maybe . . . he would have chosen me over my brother. And just the thought of that was enough to make me smile.
When I made it to the side of the stage, Falcon turned me to face him.
“I love you. You are so pure, raw, and authentic. You are love in human form. God is using you to remind the world of what matters most—love. Love in all forms, in all ways, for all people. Babies are gonna be conceived after your show tonight. Take pride in that, and fill these people with the emotion, intimacy, and love that only Eli Tate can.” He tilted my head and gave me a quick kiss. “You’re going to do amazing, Smiley. Have a great show.”
The crowd erupted just as he’d finished, and I was about to cry all over again. This time for a different, better reason. I gave him a lingering hug and kiss before making my way onto the stage. As soon as I did, the crowd erupted and went even higher. In that moment, my father didn’t matter. My desire to please him didn’t matter. My frustration with our relationship didn’t matter. All that mattered was my music, and my aura, and I was pouring every ounce of love I had onto this stage and directing it to the audience, but especially my man.
Chapter
Eighteen
Falcon
It didn’t surpriseme when I looked at my door camera and saw Isaac. After Eli’s show last night, she wanted to come home with me. She told him that she needed some space but didn’t say where she was going. I told her she could stay as long as she needed to and that if she wanted her own space, I’d buy her a home. Whatever she wanted, she’d have. I tried to go with her to pack her bags, but she was worried about there being tension between me and Isaac and promised she’d meet me here. A part of me was worried that she’d get home and allow her brother to change her mind about leaving, but to my surprise, she stayed firm and did what she believed was best for her.
Truth was, I’d always been aware of the weird dynamic she had with her father. A lot of times, her relationship with Isaac made up for it, but there were times when he was just as insensitive and inconsiderate. I knew not all men were soft toward their daughters, but Senior took that shit to another level. It had always been weird to me that he never worked to putforth effort to have a closer relationship with her, but I never felt like it was my place to address it—until now.
As gently as I could, I slid from under Eli. I’d gotten up to handle my hygiene and climbed back into bed, and her ass was still sleep. Since she was normally a light sleeper, I knew preparing for the show these last couple of months had drained her. My mind was already working, thinking of ways I could treat her.
After opening the door, I allowed Isaac to come inside. He looked around briefly before heading toward the couch, but he didn’t sit down.
“Is my sister here?” were the first words out of his mouth.
“If she wanted you to know where she was, she would have told you. If she is here, just know she’s safe.”
His head tilted and eyes tightened as he stared at me. “That’s where we at with it now? You inserting yourself in my family business and choosing my sister over me? Where’s your loyalty, bruh?”
Sighing, I ran my hand over my waves. “I’m loyal to right. I always have your back, right or wrong, but you know I’ll tell you when you’re wrong, and I expect the same from you when I’m wrong. I’m not choosing your sister over you, but she needs support, and seeing as you’re riding for your pops, I’m riding for her. It’s only fair, and I thought you’d appreciate and respect that. You told me to take care of her and protect her. What exactly did you mean by that? Or did you not want me to protect her from your father?”
“She doesn’t need protection from him.”
“Actually, she does. I get that you might not see anything wrong with how he talks to her, but she’s a woman, and she’s not an athlete. The way he talks to us won’t work with her. Outside of that, Senior never puts forth effort to spend time with his daughter. Just because she’s an adult, that doesn’t mean shedoesn’t need her father in her life. She said the man has never even told her that he loves her before, and she questions if he even likes her, but I know that’s not a concern of yours, is it?”
Isaac huffed as he sat down. “She said that shit? I mean, now that I think about it, I can’t recall a time where I heard him tell her he loved her, but I thought he’d said it when they were alone. Of course he loves her, though, even if he’s never said it.”
“But has he told you he loves you?”
Silence filled the space before he said, “Of course.”
