“What does that mean?”
“It means I don’t dream of having a home with a sweet little wife and a gaggle of children running around. I like my peace. My solitude. I don’t need any of that other shit.”
She recoiled. “What’s so wrong with wanting that for myself?”
“It’s boring. Life out here . . .” Vade looked up at the stars. “Not knowing what each day will bring . . .this is living. No one goes to that frozen wasteland willingly, and The Points are a place I’d be stuck in if I hadn’t left. It’s a place where I’d be tied down to some woman with kids I didn’t give a shit about. The kind of boring lifeyouwant.”
The harshness of his answer made her no longer care about prying. “Just because you want to be by yourself doesn’t mean you should shame me for wanting the opposite. Being out here, seeing different cities and exploring the continent is all I ever wanted before I settled down. I’ve only known Minro, but I love my village, and once we’re free of this spell, I’m going back and starting that life for myself. And you don’t get to make me feel bad about that decision.”
Vade scoffed.
As quickly as peace had settled between them, it had broken. She didn’t know why she let herself get her hopes up that they could go one day without arguing.
“You can huff and puff all you want, but at least I won’t be lonely for the rest of my life. You really want to spend all your days killing? Not knowing what city you’ll end up in each day? Never having a real home?”
He removed the skewers from over the fire and set them on a rock to cool. “That’s exactly what I want. To do what I’m good at, make a shit ton of money, see the world, and not be bothered by anyone.”
She didn’t wait for him to hand her a skewer and grabbed one. “All that money and nothing to spend it on. Why does it mean so much to you?”
He grabbed the other skewer. “Are you really asking why I care about money? It can control whether you live or die. It’s the most important thing there is.”
Orelia ripped into the meat with her teeth, the steam making her nose hot.“I’d argue that happiness and love are more important.”
“Says the poor witch . . .” he grumbled.
She scowled at him. “Live your life how you want, but you’re going to be lonely for the rest of your life. And one day that loneliness isn’t going to feel like freedom.”
Vade took a giant bite and spoke with his mouth open. “I prefer it this way.”
She couldn’t imagine traipsing all over Nivinia alone for the rest of her life. The world was wide, and she’d seen so littleof it, but to roam alone forever? “Don’t you ever want to find love? Don’t you want to share your life with someone?”
He swallowed and wiped his mouth with his forearm. “Love is for soft-minded idiots.”
She shook her head. “What happened to you to make your outlook on everything so bleak? What did life do to you to make you this way?”
The wall that had come down in their earlier conversation shot straight back up as his black eyes dragged to hers. There would be no more questions. No more revealing his thoughts or feelings.
“Life turned its back on me when I needed it most.”
seventeen
After two days inthe woods, all Orelia wanted was a soft bed and a hot meal, but the closer they got to Fink, the more her hopes for either dwindled.
She smelled the swamp town a half mile before they arrived, and the stench only worsened as they entered the town proper. Unwashed bodies, stale ale, and the potent scent of manure filled the streets. She chose her footing carefully so as not to soil her new boots as they walked down the main street that appeared permanently muddy. The hairs around her face curled in the humidity, and a hot line of sweat dripped down her sore back. Vade had her practicing swordfighting for many marks over the last two days and her body still hadn’t recovered. Orelia swatted at the cloud of mosquitoes buzzing around her head to no avail.
From what she could tell, humans and dwarves made up most of the town. Their worn and tattered clothing hung off their thin frames, the wooden buildings leaned, the children didn’t play, and the animals hardly stirred. There wasn’t a trulight in sight, only stubby candles whose glow couldn’t quite penetrate the mist.
She’d never seen a place so full of life yet devoid of it all together. The sky, the clothing, even the shade of the townspeople’s skin all looked one color in the gloom. Gray. Not a place she would have elected to stop for the night, but Vade had gotten a name on the stone pulling him this direction.
They stepped into a tavern with an unreadable sign hanging off a rusty chain. The smell was even worse inside. Dirty faces eyed Orelia as she passed, and a table of human men missing most of their teeth made flicking motions at her with their tongues.
Vade gave them a look she wouldn’t want to have directed at her, and they blanched, going back to their half-empty ales. He stayed close to her as they made their way to the back corner where two dwarves who looked like they hadn’t seen a bath in months laughed at something one of them said.
Vade stopped in front of their table. “Move.”
One of the men looked at her with a flicker of interest, then at the imposing fae. “We was here first. Get your own fuckin’ table.” He brought his mug to his mouth and nearly missed, swaying as ale sloshed over the rim.
“Take your whore and go somewhere else, bastard,” the other man said, scowling.
