“Obviously,” I murmur, looking at my hand.
I almost always stack her deck. I’d rather put my thumb on the scale than give fate the opportunity to be lazy.
She thinks I don’t pay attention to that shit, but she’s sweet-talked me into at least three dozen tarot readings over the years. Not to mention, the side project I’ve been working on for the last six months or so has given me a lot of time to learn about all her divination stuff. It’s almost too easy.
At least I was honest in saying I’ve been manipulating the situation between her and Jason. That has to count for something.
If that weren’t enough amusement, she also gave me the image of her pupils dilating right at the end there. She felt the tension between us and might finally be admitting it to herself. Whenever we’re together, everything feelsright. I hope the rest of her night with Jason is spent questioning every last word out of his mouth.
“Wow.” Casper sucks his teeth and shakes his head, then glances at Thor. “So that’s what rock bottom looks like, huh?” He nods in my direction.
Thor smirks.
“A loaded tarot deck? Next you’ll tell me you jaywalked.”
“Oh, fuck off. I’ve tried telling her to break up with Jason, but she doesn’t listen to me. She’ll take advice from a fucking deck of cards before the guy who actually gives a shit.” I fold my cards and huff out a breath. “So yeah, I planted the seed that she needs to get rid of him.”
“Hey, instead of manipulating a deck of cards, why don’t you manipulate her pussy and be done with this fucking friend zone bullshit?”
Thor spits. “Try plantingthatseed in her next time. I guarantee it’ll yield better results.”
“He’s such a Scorpio,” Casper adds, showing his hand.
I collect and shuffle the cards while Casper neatly folds his winnings in front of him, then unwraps one of the burgers and takes a huge bite. “Soon, it won’t matter anyway,” I add, dealing everyone another round.
Thor makes a disgruntled sound. He wasn’t thrilled about the idea, but I will owe him a favor, and as previously established, favors are high currency for outlaws.
More cash is thrown in the middle of the table. I swap out two cards, hoping for a jack. Nada. Fold.
“That’s your redemption arc,” Casper says, pointing at me with his already half-eaten burger.
Thor sighs. “She’s going to hate you for this. Hell,Ihate you for this.”
“She doesn’t have to know.”
Casper smirks. “Ah, yes, the plan to make her fall in love with you. Something you haven’t been able to accomplish for the last three years, but sure, add a hard deadline, that ought to help.”
“I haven’t been trying the last three years, I’ve been keeping my word to Clyde.”
Thor tosses in more cash, upping the ante. “If you keep going about it like this, you’ll be buried next to Clyde before that ever happens. You’re too old for this shit—but hey, maybe in twenty more fake tarot spreads, you’ll earn her crystal privileges.”
Casper’s expression is laced with faux amusement. “Then you’re only eighty tea leaf readings away from a séance. Sixty of those and she’ll hold your hand.”
“Yeah, for a fucking palm reading,” Thor snorts.
They give Kelly shit for her esoteric rituals, looking for omens and signs from the universe, but they love her.
“How many palm readings until you get to first base?” Casper asks, shaking his head. “At least I know how to talk to women. You two are pathetic.”
“I talk to women,” Thor argues. “You’re the one running thirteen background checks before introducing yourself.”
“Asking'You like that, baby?' and her yelling 'Harder' is not a conversation,” he replies.
I cross my arms over my chest. “Thor’s got a point. What’s even left to talk about after you’ve hacked into her ISP and mapped her jogging route through traffic cams?”
“Oh, you’re one to fucking talk,” Casper replies, nodding to the pot. “All in.”
“You sure you wanna go all in with that?” I ask.
