"Why are you being like this?" She takes a step toward thetable, hands curled at her sides. "I know what I felt and none of it felt like a mistake. I don't believe you."
"You don't believe me?"
I shove the chair back and stand. "I don't need you to believe me. In fact, I think it’s time I lay down some rules here. The only thing I need from you, is to remember why I got you out of that basement in the first place." I stalk closer to her, watching her body tense, her breathing becomes shallow. "I didn't bring you here because I needed a friend.”
I let my gaze drop low, before lifting it. “Or a pussy to fuck.”
She backs up, her shoulders hitting the wall.
"You're here for one reason,” I continue. “You read people for me. You give me information I need to deal with anyone who tries to fuck with my operation. A week from now. Ten years from now. Doesn’t matter. You'll still be with me, doing what I tell you. That's the arrangement. You remember that, and we won’t have any problems."
"The arrangement,” she repeats, mouthing the word like it’s a foreign language. "If that's what this is, what do I get out of it?"
"I take care of you and keep you safe."
"Your father said that too. He said he could allow worse things to happen to me, but he didn’t."
The words hit me like a fist to the gut.
Fuck this.
Nala knows I’d never let anyone hurt her.
"Am I keeping you in a basement?"
"No,” she says, tears shining in her eyes. "But it’s starting to feel the same. I have windows I can't open and blinds I can’t see through. You’re telling me my feelings don’t matter and reminding me you’re in charge.”
Her voice shakes. “I thought we were friends, in a way. Now you’re telling me I’m nothing. Neither of you see me asa person. You don’t think I have feelings. I'm just a thing you can use and treat however you like. I guess I should be glad you didn’t change your mind about hitting me."
Hit her?
My fists ache. I want to punch the wall. Myself. Anything.
"I would never hit you.” My voice is rough, raw, unrecognizable. “I’d never let anyone hurt you. Ever.”
"No?” Her lips tremble. “Then it’s just my heart you don’t mind hurting.”
Don’t cry.
Please don’t cry.
I want to take it all back. Every hurtful word I told her. But I don’t. This was my goal and it’s done.
"If you want to see this as a prison, I can’t stop you. Just don’t confuse me with my father. We’re nothing alike when it comes to you.”
Her features close up. “Fine,” she says quietly. “Can I go back to my room now?”
“Feel free.”
She doesn’t look at me as she steps into her room and closes the door. This is for the best, I remind myself, waiting for the relief to hit me. It doesn’t. If anything, I feel worse than before, not a single weight lifted off my damn shoulder. They feel heavier than they’ve ever felt in my entire life.
An hour later, I'm in the backroom at Alexei shop again. It’s the four of us.
"Who fucked you up?" Dimitri asks the second I walk in.
"Didn't sleep."
Alexei studies my face, leaning back in his chair. "None of us are sleeping well these days, but you do look like hell. I've never seen you like this.” He glances at the others. Doesn't he look like shit?"
