“What do you want, baby?” he asks huskily. Pained at taking this slow.
“I want to taste more of you,” I plead, placing my hands on his legs, beckoning him to move forward. He straddles me as his cock is mere inches from my mouth. He is thick and hard, and so very mine. I lean forward, sticking my tongue out to lick his tip, and he groans, moving forward. I take this opportunity to grab his ass, angling him closer.
I can’t take it. I’m desperate for him. “Fuck my mouth, Manny,” I beg. “Please.” He moves over, cradling his hand under my head as he holds me in place with one hand, using the other to feed me his cock. I open for him, and his taste floods me. The feel of him as I explore his soft, velvety cock with my tongue has me squirming, trying to stop the building ache between my legs that is begging to be filled by only him. He pushes his length in and out in a rhythm that has me gasping for breath in between thrusts, but I don’t complain even when he picks up his pace. I open my throat, taking more of him in.
He moans and stops mid-thrust. “I am going to come like this if I continue, and I want to fuck you first, then paint you in my cum.” I nod, so ready for it, as he pulls out of my mouth in one stroke, and a band of saliva trails down my chin. He scoots down the bed, leaning into me, and kisses me so deeply. His tongue is everywhere and not nearly enough. He breaks the kiss, steps off the bed, and pulls me until my legs hang off. He lifts my legs, throwing them over his shoulder. As his cock rests at my entrance, he looks at us, and I can only imagine what he is thinking as his breathing becomes more ragged. I can tell he is about to lose control, and Iam so lucky to be the one making him do so.
“I need to fuck you bare, baby,” he groans. “Please tell me you are on birth control.” I nod eagerly, and that’s all it takes for him to thrust to the hilt. I gasp at the sensation of being filled wholly by him. He begins to move at a fast pace. The way he takes me is carnal and rough, and I love every moment of it. He holds me to him, grabbing onto my ass to pull me into him as he repeatedly hits that spot that drives me wild. It’s like he already knows my body so well, playing it like an instrument. As he leans forward a little, changing the angle just slightly, the movement has me gasping as my orgasm rapidly builds. He must know that is where I need him, because he picks up the pace, hitting it repeatedly until I see stars and scream his name. He finds his own release a few thrusts later, as he pulls out and shoots strings of cum over my bare chest.
As we both come down from our endorphin high, he stares at me and the mess we’ve made before he leaves me reluctantly, in the direction of the bathroom. I lay there, breathing hard, coming back to reality from the mind-blowing orgasm that overtook me. He walks over to me with a warm cloth as he cleans me up and dries me off with another. He takes them to the bathroom, and when he returns, he falls down beside me, naked and uncaring about us being here like this. He rolls over to me and looks into my eyes, cupping my cheek so lovingly as he kisses me, conveying all the things in that act we don’t dare speak of, not wanting to acknowledge the truth. That’s okay, for now. I have to believe we still have a little time to work it out.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
The weeks are passing by quickly, and this one is no exception. I sit outside the tavern as Nadia finishes up. She chose to have an earlier shift so that she wouldn’t get out so late and would have more time to spend with us instead. I hated seeing her leave in the morning, but she has to work at the tavern, and I never hated a place more in my life. This is her last shift there, and it makes me realize that she is also slowly wrapping things up here at her lake home. I know that a conversation needs to be had, but I also know that we are both ignoring what's to come, pretending that if we don’t acknowledge it, it won’t happen. I plan on having the much-needed discussion tonight after Catalina goes to bed. I got a bottle of her favorite wine, and I plan on sitting outside with a blanket on the patio, discussinghow we can make this work between us, long distance.
She walks out with the owner’s niece, Mandy, because everyone in town knows her, as well as Gage, whom I know from coming here occasionally with the guys. She hugs them both, and they walk away, chatting with one another. Nadia picks up her pace when she sees me waving. She opens the truck door, and as she hops in, I can’t help but imagine what my life would be like with her in it permanently, instead of the alternative.
Nadia reaches for my hand, squeezing it. “Thanks for picking me up, guys.” She always includes my daughter in everything. She turns around, and Catalina beams at her.
“Ms. Nadia, are you going to be able to see my t-ball game now that you aren’t working any more Saturdays?” she asks innocently. Nadia looks to me for guidance, and I nod, encouraging her to say what I hope is a yes.
“I’d love that, pickles. I’ll be there. Maybe I can get a picture of you with your team, too?” I look over to her watching Catalina. It looks like she is trying to memorize her in case she doesn’t get another chance to see her, and that won’t do. More than ever, this conversation is happening tonight. We pull up to the house, and I order a pizza for us to share. After bathtime, Nadia continues to read Catalina her cherished bedtime stories. She comes out holding her copy ofAlice in Wonderlandto her chest. She looks so sad, and I want to wipe that look off her face. “She’s asleep,” is all she says as she places the book in her bag, walking my way. I stare at her, and she explains, “We finished the story tonight.” Her eyes convey more than that statement, and I know what she means. Everything is coming to an end.
“Let’s go outside and have some wine.” I extend my hand out to her, a blanket thrown over my arm and a wine bottle with two glasses in hand. We walk out onto the patio into the still, humid night. I bring my speaker out with me so that our conversation remains private, just in case anyone is nearby. As I hit play, Pink’s “Just Give Me a Reason” begins. Even though I live in a more residential area, the stars are still visible, peeking under their own blanket of night. Nadia pulls her legs up on the swinging bench. I pour a glass of wine for both of us and hand her one, placing thebottle on the table beside it. I sit beside her, putting my body as close to hers as possible. She leans into me, and I drape a blanket over us as she tugs one side of it, covering her sun-kissed legs. Even though it is warm outside, I feel a chill, as does she, judging by the goose bumps on her arms. “Are you cold, baby?” I ask, and she shrugs.
“Not really,” she says sadly. I take a big sip of my wine, wondering how to say what I need to say. I don’t have to because she beats me to it.
“Manny, what happens in two weeks?” She looks over at me, biting her lip before she turns away. I stare at her before answering, but she doesn’t meet my eyes.
I gently touch her face, lifting my hand to glide her chin toward me. Her eyes are closed, as if it pains her to hear whatever I am going to say.
“Open your eyes, mi amor.” She stares at me with worry, her amber-colored eyes swirling with every emotion. They are watery at the moment, as if, in any second, they will spill tears onto her rosy cheeks. “Tell me a truth, Nadia,” I beg her to say the words I want to hear. A tear falls, streaking her face with salty wetness. I kiss her cheek where the tear landed and lick my way up, kissing her eye softly. She shudders, and I can feel it—those unspoken words, being so close to her. “Tell me, baby. Please, I need to know.”
She searches my eyes and must find the answer she is looking for because she nods. She touches my hand, and I immediately intertwine my fingers with hers. “I’m afraid,” she whispers.
“What are you afraid of, mi amor?” She inhales deeply, finding her courage.
“I am afraid to leave the lake house and return to a life that no longer exists.” I stare at her, wondering what she means by that. She bites her lip hesitantly before she looks up at me and tells me how her parents died in a car accident, leaving her all alone to figure out her life. She tells me about the lake house and how she came here to seek clarity and find herself. How she left her home without cleaning the mess she found when she walked into her parents’ room before she ran away. That she buried them, without headstones, unable to even think of what she was going to haveinscribed on them, because she was so angry at all the lies they told her. She doesn’t go into detail, saying that it's too long a story and for another day, and I don’t push her.
“And did you, mi amor?” I ask, squeezing her hand. “Did you find what you needed? Did you find what you were looking for?” I ask, hoping she found the support and clarity to go on living a life without her family.
“I did.” She pauses, looking up at the night sky as a falling star shoots across the sky. She smiles as another tear falls from her eyes.
I pick up her hand and bring it to my lips in a soft kiss. “Make a wish, baby?” I nudge her with my shoulder, causing her to move forward. She looks over at me and then back up at the sky.
“I don’t need to, Manny, because I wished to find myself, and I did. I wanted to feel loved again, and you and Catalina gave me that. And most of all, I wanted to feel like I was a part of a family again, and I do.” She meets my eyes and I’m at a loss for words because how can I tell her how much she has helped me, how much she means to me, and how I never want to let her go.
So, it’s my turn to share my truth. I don’t know how to begin, but I start with the show last week. “The truth about changing the movie last week to that show, Matilda, was because when I came into the house after work one day, I saw you with Catalina, and that song from Matilda came on.” Her eyes crinkle in confusion. “‘On My Way’ by Rusted Roots?” She nods in understanding, a smile spreading across her face at the recollection of that day. “I saw you with my daughter doing things a mother would do, and it helped to fill the cracks in my heart. I once thought it was shattered beyond repair.” I hang my head in shame. “I vowed not to let anyone in again, closed myself off to any relationship, because my priority was Catalina. I failed her once with her mother, and I didn’t want to bring another woman into my life who might have the ability not just to hurt me, but her, too. I don’t think I could go through something like that again.”
She squeezes my hand and turns toward me, placing her legs on the ground. “Manny, I am falling in love with you and it scares me,” she says. “I already love your little girl, and I don’t want to leave you both.” I take her into my arms, lifting her into my lap as I strokeher hair. She drops her face into me, throwing her arms around my neck, the wine glasses long forgotten on the table.
“The truth is that I love you, too, Nadia, and I don’t know how we are going to keep this going between us, but we will find a way.”
“I want that, too, Manny.”
I kiss her, throwing every emotion into that kiss, hoping she can feel how I love her and want her in our lives. I hope my ex gets the help she needs in rehab, so that we can all move on from this and find the happiness we all deserve.
The week fliesby as we plan how to make this relationship work. Nadia has to return to school at the end of the month, but she plans to leave in two weeks to prepare for the semester. It is her last year. That’s doable. After that, we can find out where we want to live, because I know I cannot be separated from this woman again. One year seems like such a long time, but it isn’t too much between breaks and holidays. Besides, it is within driving distance. Catalina has similar holiday breaks. By the time we know it, a year will have passed, and then we can move forward with our lives. Iwill have to tell my ex about the new development, but since she isn’t out of rehab yet, I have some time to broach that subject with her. I don’t want to throw it in her face, and it seems like she is really trying to get the help she needs after this last incident, where she hit rock bottom.
