I moan and start riding him. His hands go to my hips, pushing me down hard with a punishing force. I place my hand over his, not turning away his touch, but for the first time embracing it.
God, how long has it been since I’ve allowed anyone to touch me like this? It turns me on so much, and I hold his hands there, pinning them to me. I’m lost to the sensations as I bounce up and down on his cock. I hear his breathing become labored.
“Eve, I need you to slow down.” His hand goes up over his head, and his head moves back and forth as if he can fight off the impending orgasm from crashing over him.
“I can’t slow down, it feels too good. I need this Jameson. Please let me have this.” Because I’m almost right there with him. My hands are on his shoulders, and I rock into him as he pushes up into me, meeting me thrust for thrust, both of us lost to the sensations.
“Oh, God.” I pant. “Jameson.”
He brings my face down to him and kisses me, thrusting his tongue in and out along with the pace of his cock. His chest is covered in a sheen of sweat, and my juices run down his cock, soaking his balls. The sloppy sounds of our fucking fill the room. He grabs my ass and brings me down more forcefully, and I swear he is so deep, hitting that sweet spot no one could ever find.
“That’s it, Jameson. Keep doing that.” I throw my head back, and he meets me thrust for thrust. My walls start to convulse as I come so hard that I almost black out.
He fucks me through the orgasm, and he comes after a few more deep thrusts. He brings me down to him, threading our hands together as he kisses me. I collapse onto his chest, and he strokes my back gently. And I allow it. Wetness fills my vision, and everything is blurry.
“Where have you been all this time, Eve?” he whispers, but I don’t think he expects an answer, and I certainly don’t offer him one.
Not once does he ask about my mask.
Chapter Eleven
EVIE
“Decode” by Paramore
Iwatch Jameson sleep, and I can’t help but stare at him. He looks so peaceful, and I bet he does it without a care in the world. He probably doesn’t even dream. I envy him for that. To be able to sleep without waking up from a nightmare that you relive whenever you begin to think you feel safe, but I haven’t felt safe in a very long time.
Retrieving my clothes, I quickly dress and stare at his sleeping form before leaving. I’m trying to take a mental picture of him this way. Instead, I take out my phone.Click.
Without looking back, because if I do I may do something crazy like crawling back into bed and staying. For once, I felt seen, and I don’t want to go back to being invisible.
No more masks.
Grabbing the mask, looking down at it one last time before letting it fall onto the table. I vow that the next time I see him, he will see all of me—no more hiding, at least not from him. Reality, on the other hand, has different plans for me. I have to put my happiness on the back burner if I want to help my family. The only family I have left are my siblings.
I take one more look around his apartment and walk out the door with a silent prayer falling from my lips that maybe one day I can have him. I can choose to be selfish and have my happy ending, too, but for now, I can’t let this continue. I have to keep Emma safe. This thing we are doing is a luxury that I can’t have. If I just keep repeating it over and over to myself, I just might start to believe it. Our need to get revenge is more important. I can’t have any more distractions, and Jameson is a huge distraction for me.
When I get back to my car, I slide into the driver seat and just sit there with the engine idling. I don’t want to leave, but I force myself to pull away and drive back to my place, leaving a piece of my tattered heart behind as I drive away.
As I pull into my parking spot just before dawn, I see someone jogging out of the complex, and another is leaving for work. I always feel like a loser when I arrive home in the early hours of the morning after a night out at the club. My sister calls it the 'walk of shame,’ and it's tough to head to bed while everyone else is just starting their day.
I drag myself up the stairs and open the door when a big yawn escapes me, scratch my head, and throw my bag on the kitchen island. I fill a glass of water, turning around to lean against the counter, when I come face to face with Mateo staring at me.
“Dear God!” I jump back, sloshing half of the water out of my glass. “Bro, what is wrong with you? You almost gave me a heart attack. Don’t sneak up on me like that.” I flick the water off my tank top, now sporting a huge wet spot in the center. I frown looking down at it, then grab a towel to pat myself dry. I chugthe remaining water and place the glass in the sink. Mateo is still staring at me. “What?” I look at him, trying to decipher what his deal is.
“Oh, looks like someone had a rendezvous. Did you see that guy again?”
I look quizzically at him. “Who?”
He snorts. “Don’t play dumb, sister. It doesn’t suit you.”
I smile, displaying my straight, white teeth. “You’ll have to be more specific, Mattie. I’m not twelve.” We laugh and then realize the implications of that comment as our laughter dies out.
We didn’t get that chance to have that relationship because he was sent away. I didn’t even know I had a brother until recently. Now, he and my sister have become the most important people in my life. Another part of me thinks that maybe Jameson can be my person, too.
A hand lands on my shoulder. I jump at the unexpected touch.
“Relax. I didn’t mean to startle you.” He brings me into him and kisses the top of my head.
