Annica shakes her off, still looking at me. “Answer!”
“I—” I look around to the rest of our friends now gathered in the hall. “It was an accident. It was just one time.”
Dani’s mouth falls open as I hear one of the boys let out a low whistle.
“An accident? What, did you trip and fall into his bed, Sloane, what the fuck? How could you keep this from us, and then lie right to my face about it on Halloween!” Annica fumes. Asher groggily comes from his room to see what the commotion is, his split lip bruising over now. “Ah, perfect timing, here’s your cheating boyfriend! I guess you two have that in common at least. Asher, do you not even care that she’s sleeping with Wes?”
Asher only shrugs.
“Oh my god,whatis going on in this group?” Annica throws her hands up, defeated.
I try to reach for her. “Annica, I’m sorry, okay—”
“No, don’t touch me. We are not friends. Friends don’t lie.”
She turns on her heel and strides for her room, slamming the door. Dani gives me a sad smile, touching my arm, before following Annica to their room. I let out a long, shaky breath, trying to process what just happened. Asher turns to go back to the bedroom, and Wes grabs my hand, but I pull away, intent on going after Asher.
“This is all your fault,” I say, storming after him.
He turns when we get into the room. “My fault?”
“Yes! I never would’ve gone in there last night if you would’ve just stayed here! Why couldn’t you just stay here?”
He shakes his head. “Because this”—he motions between the two of us—“isn’t the plan. We can’t... be that way and I just... I needed to get out of here. I needed—”
“What, what is it that you needed?” I bite out.
“Someone else,” he says quietly.
My arms go slack at my sides and my voice cracks. “Well, I neededyou, Asher. My life is falling apart and you are the only person who knows it. I needed you.” I can feel the tears streaming from my cheeks again as I so desperately cry over him, of all people.
He looks away like he doesn’t want to watch me cry. “This is all going to work out, Sloane. Whatever just happened out there was for the best. Okay? Wes will probably have to break up with Marissa after this, we’ll call off our fake thing too, and you’ll have Wes. You want Wes, remember? You want Wes.” I can’t tell if he is trying to remind me or himself, as he keeps repeating it.
“I’m glad you have this all sorted out,” I say bitterly through my tears.
“You saw what happens to me if I don’t.”
I clench my jaw and I think about his teary green eyes last night. And it all makes sense to me now. The way he is, and why he does the things he does. The way Wes is always watching him when he’s near me. I thought it was jealousy but now I think it was partially out of fear that Asher would turn out to be like Ben. And god, I want to hate Asher so badly still, but I just can’t.
I take a moment to calm down. “I will help you get what you want, but we can’t do this anymore. I don’t want your help and I don’t want to be your fake girlfriend anymore.”
“Fine,” he says.
“Fine.”
Chapter 22
January
January 2 comes faster than I expect, and I haven’t heard from Miles since I suspected he was in Colorado when we were. I say goodbye to my family after being there all winter break, and hug Claire extra tight before packing up my car. It’s a three-hour drive from Cedar Falls to Boston, where the art show will be held.
I’ve decided I am going to end this with Holland. This time I won’t back out like I did twice before.
I know Asher prepaid for the hotel room downtown and can’t get a refund if we cancel: He told me so when he booked it last month. Back when we planned to do this together. So when I get to the check-in counter I’m not surprised by how easy it is. That and the fact that the girl at the counter looks to be eighteen and too into the book she’s reading to care about her job. She hands me the key for room 317 without asking for an ID or even a card for a security deposit. All she says is that they had to change the room to a single king suite and they’d refund the difference to the card on file. Notthat it matters now that I’m doing this solo. I take my duffel bag and go to the third floor.
In the middle of my shower, a loud noise from the hotel room makes me pause. I shut the water off and remain still, listening. What if it’s Holland? What if he tracked me here and now I’m alone in this room, with no one to help me? Another noise makes me jump. There’s definitely someone out there. I slowly get out of the shower, wrapping a towel around me and securing it tight before grabbing the hotel-supplied hair dryer under the sink. It’s better than nothing, I guess. Tiptoeing from the bathroom, I open the door slightly, holding the dryer above my head, ready to strike the intruder.
“I thought that was your bag on the bed,” Asher says, standing in the middle of the room. I let out the breath I was holding, and the hair dryer falls to my side. “Were you... going to hit me with that?” He laughs.
