It’s a hysterical, release-of-tension sound that I can’t stop. It bubbles up from my chest and spills out, leaving me gasping and wiping my eyes.
“We were... we were interrupted by an anxious blob,” I manage between giggles.
“He has impeccable timing,” Crash agrees, though he sounds more pained than amused. He’s still pressed against the wall like he doesn’t trust himself to move closer. “Very... protective.”
Jitters makes a pitiful sound and oozes closer, turning apologetic pink but still vibrating with nerves.
“I think he thought we were fighting,” I realize, watching the blob cautiously approach. “He was trying to interrupt conflict.”
“By launching himself between us like a gelatinous projectile,” Crash says. “Very heroic. Also very unfortunate timing.”
I kneel down, offering my hand to Jitters, who immediately oozes up my arm and settles around my shoulders like an anxious scarf. He’s still vibrating, but the color is shifting from panicked orange to worried lavender.
“It’s okay,” I tell him softly. “We weren’t fighting. We were just...” I trail off, looking at Crash. “What were we doing?”
“Conducting a very thorough medical examination,” Crash supplies, his voice still strained. “Which apparently appearedthreatening to blob creatures with poor conflict recognition skills.”
“Right. Medical examination.” I stand up, Jitters still draped over my shoulders like guilty conscience. “We should... probably check our course.”
“Yes,” Crash agrees, though he still hasn’t moved from the wall and I can see exactly why through the thin material of his sleep pants. “Very practical. Navigation is important.”
“Critical, even.”
“Essential to survival.”
We’re both still breathing hard. Neither of us is looking at the navigation console.
“I could check the course,” I offer.
“That would be advisable.”
“Or you could check the course.”
“I could. Yes. That is something I could do.” He doesn’t move.
Jitters warbles something that sounds distinctly judgmental.
“We’re being mocked by the anxiety blob,” I observe.
“He makes a valid point,” Crash admits. “We are both standing here discussing navigation without actually navigating.”
“In our defense, we were interrupted during a critical medical examination.”
“Very critical,” he agrees. “Potentially life-saving.”
“Definitely life-saving.”
“We should probably resume the examination later,” he suggests carefully. “When we are both more... prepared for the consequences.”
“Of the medical examination.”
“Yes. The medical examination that was making us both forget how to breathe properly.”
I bite my lip to stop another laugh. “You’re very articulate for someone who claims to need romance novel research.”
“I am improvising wildly and hoping I do not embarrass myself,” he admits. “Though I suspect I have already failed at that objective.”
“You haven’t embarrassed yourself.” I adjust Jitters on my shoulders and finally turn toward the navigation console, needing space before I do something stupid. “You’ve just... you’ve made it very clear that your glands are functioning properly.”
