It’s almost silent, save the sounds of the cars on the street at the end of the alley and the faint beat of the bass from inside the club.
“Kade?” I weakly call out to him. “Please,” I start to beg him, but my throat closes and tears prick my eyes. I’d give anything to be with him. But he left as soon as he saw me. Nothing’s changed. He doesn’t want to be with me.
“You never loved me, did you?” I talk to his back, but that finally gets a reaction from him. He turns around, and my heart slows.
He still looks the same.
His sharp jaw has several days of stubble and his hair is grown out slightly, but the dominance and hard features are still present and they make me want to drop to my knees in this dirty alley. But I don’t. I won’t do that for a man who doesn’t love me.
He opens his mouth, but doesn’t say anything. He swallows thickly and watches the door as it opens, bringing the loud noises of the club along with it. He closes the space between us and puts his hand on my hip, although his eyes are on whoever left the building. I can hear their steps grow distant as they walk in the opposite direction and farther away from us.
Finally, he looks down into my eyes.
* * *
My heart clenches in my chest. I don’t know why he’s here; he's supposed to be in jail. I tried so hard to track him down that first year. But they wouldn't tell me anything. I felt pathetic for even trying to find him, but also like I'd failed him for never seeing him. But then again, I found solace knowing he'd never looked back.
In this moment, I know one of two things will happen. Either he tells me he loves me and we find a way to make this work between us, or he doesn’t and I leave him behind forever.
“I just need to know if you ever loved me.” I stare into his eyes and ignore the tears running down my face. It may kill a small part of me to hear he never did, but I’ll survive. I just need to know.
He cups my jaw in his hand and runs his thumb along my bottom lip. My head falls back slightly and my lips part.
“I should tell you I never did. I should do that for you. I should lie.” Hope blooms in my chest, and I take in a deep breath.
“But I’m a selfish man, and I love you so fucking much.”
My heart swells and hurts so much I can hardly stand it. This time it's a good pain.
“I don’t deserve you, and I’ll understand it if you send me away. I’ll stay away; I promise I will. But if you have any feelings for me left at all, I want you, Olivia. I want to build a life with you. An honest life. I’m done with all that. I promise you.”
I wipe the tears away from under my eyes, trying to calm myself, but it’s so hard. I’ve dreamed of him coming back for me, but I never thought it was possible. I didn't think I'd ever see him again.
He loves me.
I want to beat my fists against his chest for leaving me. For throwing me away all those years ago. For not telling me the truth. For never looking back. Somewhere in me, there's anger.
But more than anything, I just want him to hold me. I miss him.
I lose all composure and wrap my arms around him, kissing him with everything I have.
And he holds me back just as tight, kissing me with passion and longing. He pulls my body against his hard, muscular chest. His tongue dives into my mouth and I lean into him. My body lights with a desire I haven't known for years.
He breaks the kiss and pulls away, both of us breathing heavily. “Not here, angel.” He kisses my hair and looks back at the door.
After a long moment, I finally ask him, “You’re really here?”
“I’m here, Olivia. If you want me, I’m here.”
“I do want you.”
“Somehow I knew you’d come back for me,” I whisper into his chest. I don’t know how, but I knew. Years later, I still feel like my heart belongs to him.
“I’m so sorry.” He kisses my hair and holds me closer to him. “I wanted you to live your life. I wanted so much more for you than what I could give you. I'll make it up to you. Every day for the rest of my life.”
* * *
“All I want is you, Kade. I love you.” I need him. My heart and soul need him.
