Kes had no affinity with Moth. She was a good horse, came from a prestigious breeder, and the most tolerant of mares. But she was just a tool to Kes.
What would Nila do if I gave her Moth?
Would she open her heart more readily? Would she see I only meant to do what was required of me while trying to protect her from everything in my power?
Standing between the two horses, I scratched each behind their ears.
Moth was soft and kind and reliable. But she was no match for Wings. Where Moth was eager to please and fast to react, Wings had a heart similar to mine—an imposter’s heart where obedience was required but breaking the rules was the only way to survive.
Rubbing Wings down, I quickly saddled him and held his head while I fed the bit into his mouth. He stomped, pawing at the ground.
I could’ve had the stable hands tend to him.
But I wanted to do it.
It relaxed me, and with Nila in my life, I needed all the relaxation I could get.
The sun was out and today could be a good day. If only there was one other person here, it could’ve been perfect.
Pulling out my phone, I called my sister.
It rang a few times too long and the familiar panic where her safety was concerned came over me.
“Jethro? Why are you calling me—isn’t the match about to start?” Her soft voice came down the phone, sliding straight into my ear.
“You really should’ve come with us, Jaz. The sun is out and the sky is crystal clear.”
“Maybe next time.”
Maybe next time.
Her favourite expression.
Only thing was there was never a next time because she would refuse to go on that outing, too.
I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “Okay, well I better go. Just wanted to check on you and let you know I’ll win again and give you the crystal vase or whatever shit they give us.”
Jaz giggled. “Okay. Be safe. And remember what I said. Try to figure out a way to face what you are. No more ‘fixing’. Get that woman to love you then you can hide again.”
I didn’t want to tell her that it’d gotten to the point where I could no longer hide—even from myself.
“Sure, easy done.” My tone dripped with sarcasm. Before she could respond, I added, “See you when we get back tonight.”
Hanging up, I looked at the screen.
I spotted Kestrel striding back alone across the field. I knew he would’ve stopped to place a wager on our team in the betting gazebo.
My stomach tensed.
Nila would be on her own. Cut and Daniel would never leave the gambling tent, so I just had to hope to God that whoever was mingling in our private space would leave her alone. She’d be surrounded by Black Diamond brothers peddling illegal stones. She would be untouchable under their protection. Not to mention imprisoned if she had a lunatic idea of running.
Escaping us was never that easy. There was a reason why her ancestors never fled.
My fingers drummed against my phone. Going against all better judgement, I opened a new message and typed:
Kite007:I’m assuming you haven’t replied because of what happened the other day. But perhaps now you’re ready to talk. You have questions. Lots of questions. What if I told you it would be easier for me to answer this way than any other?
My heart rate spiked, hovering my finger over the send button.
