I don’t answer right away.Old habits die hard.
“That one with the crooked chimney,” she adds.“Used to smoke worse than it should.”
“Still does,” I say.
She nods, satisfied.“Means it’s still standin’.”
The cash register clatters with every button, a metered, stubborn rhythm that fills the gaps in conversation.
She slides my receipt across the counter and pauses, studying my face.“You hunt?”
“No.”
“Fish?”
“No.”
She frowns.“You from around here?”
“Not really.”
Another nod, like that explains everything.“Well.Church is Sundays.Snow comes early.Don’t trust the weather report.And don’t let Earl sell you honey unless you’ve tasted it first.”
“Why?”
She leans closer.“Bees eat wild onions.”
Chuckling, I thank her and carry my bag out, the paper cutting into my fingers.The goat watches me go, unimpressed.
Outside, the air feels cleaner.Thinner.Like it hasn’t been recycled through a dozen buildings before reaching my lungs.The mountains press in on all sides, tree-covered and quiet, the kind of quiet that doesn’t feel empty—just uninterested.
This is what anonymity looks like.
Back at the cabin, I unload the groceries in silence.No radio.No phone.No voice in my ear telling me what comes next.Just wind in the trees and the low thud of my boots on warped floorboards.
I should feel relieved.
Instead, I feel unmoored.
My old life ran on structure—targets, timelines, contingencies.Even chaos had rules.This doesn’t.This asks me to choose how to spend an afternoon without anyone measuring the outcome.
I sit at the table and read the Bible I picked up on the way up here but still haven’t read.
I don’t open it right away.I stare at the cover, at the clean spine that hasn’t been broken in yet.New things make me uneasy.They come with expectations.
Control.Certainty.The belief that I could think my way out of anything.
I pick up the Bible and open it without a plan.
The pages fall where they want to, thin paper whispering under my thumb.I don’t flip away.I don’t second-guess it.
My eyes land on the words, clear and unassuming.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
I read it once.
