He stares at me. Pensive. "If you really want this side of me, I won't be able to hide certain things from you."
"I don't want you to hide anything from me."
"Don't ask questions. I'm not prepared to tell you the answers."
"I already told you I won't."
He stands and walks with measured strides to the cupboard, punches a set of numbers into the safe, and pulls out a gun harness. I hold my breath. He turns to face me deadpan and clenches his jaw when he sees me studying the black straps and leather holster. His eyes are anchored to mine as he slides the harness over his shoulders. He reachesinto the safe and pulls out the black handgun I saw earlier. Grabbing the magazine, he loads the gun. I flinch when it clicks into place.
Holding my eyes, he tucks the gun into the left side of his holster and fastens it tightly with a clip.
My body swarms with discomfort and fear and... lust? But more than anything, gazing at Max Butcher in a harness, knowing all that I know about his world and accepting that there is so much more that I don't, I just want him safe. I want himkeptsafe. That gun might just do that, and so I decide to like it. I finally breathe out.
"Come here," he orders. "Give me a kiss goodbye."
My heart flutters. I'm immediately on my feet and closing the space between us. Rising onto my tippy toes, I reach up to hold his neck and press my lips to his. He envelops me with big, strong arms. I grasp at them, running my nails lightly along his muscles. Surely, Max is too strong to die.
He only has to care a little
Max leavesto join his brothers, and I spend the next few hours preparing for the wedding. After slipping into my dress, a nude, backless piece that stops at mid-thigh, I straighten my hair, then spray it to keep it smooth. Positioning myself in front of the mirror, I apply a tiny amount of makeup, contouring my face, adding little ticks to the corners of my eyes, and smacking on natural gloss.
As I stare at my reflection, I feel a flutter of nerves. This is definitely a sexier look than I usually go for. I'd like to see Toni call me an asexual pigeon now. I giggle. I'd like to see him call me an asexual pigeon at all. I'm a falcon now. I giggle again.
It's four p.m. when I slip on my wedges and join Flick and Stacey on their way to the chapel. It's a classic building with stained glass windows and steep walls and is surrounded by lush, green grass. Indonesia might be predominantly Muslim and Hindu, but it's a wedding destination for all faiths.
I try to catch Stacey's eye, flicking her a smile, but she pretends she doesn't see it.
She merely picks up pace and strides ahead of us. "There's going to be over three hundred people here today. If we want a seat, we better get a move on."
I stumble on the cobblestone road. "Wow."
"That's insanity," Flick says, scooping her long red hair to the side.
"I don't even know three hundred people," I say, chuckling awkwardly.
Stacey stares straight ahead at the church. "Family has flown here all the way from Sicily and most of them haven't even met the bride and groom, but it doesn’t matter. If you’re Family, you're invited. If you're not invited, well, there's a message in that."
I struggle to keep up with her as she charges ahead. "Three hundred is a big family, " I say.
She glances over her shoulder at me. "Yeah, it is, Cassidy."
I still. "Stacey, stop walking." She slows. "I'm so sorry about the way Max spoke to you. Don't be upset with me." She halts altogether. When she turns around, she's even more tight faced than she was before.
Flick eyes us both. "What's going on?"
"Cassidy and Max are officiallytogether," Stacey says.
Flick forces a smile and looks at me. "Well, that's what you wanted, right?"
I refrain from beaming like a silly little girl. "Yes."
She nods. "Are you happy?"
"Knee-weak happy," I say.
She laughs a little. "But do you trust him?"
"I have to. I've decided I'd rather risk heartbreak than regret."
