“And that explains why Tori would cover it up—she was protecting her son, not her husband.”
At that moment, I understand so much more about her—the glumness and air of disappointment, the look in her eyes that always suggested a fear that the other shoe was about to drop. “Should we say anything to the police?”
“Yeah, you should mention Taylor when you give your statementtomorrow, but I bet they’re halfway to figuring it out. Tori helped you get away, so she might have even come clean.”
I bring my hands to my face and press them against my eyes, being careful not to touch my throbbing cheek. The muscles in my lower back ache, too, probably from the way I landed when Liam tackled me.
“You okay?” Sam asks.
“Yeah, but fried. I probably should try to get some sleep.”
“What if I stay?”
I lower my hands and meet his eyes. I take a minute to think, but from the start I’m pretty sure of my response. As hard as it is to say no, I shake my head.
“Thank you, Sam,” I say. “I appreciate the offer, but I think I’m going to pass.”
“I wouldn’t have to share a bed with you,” he says. “I could sleep on the couch and just keep an eye out. I hate the idea of you being alone tonight.”
“That’s very thoughtful of you, but I’ll be okay here.”
He cocks his head and studies me with one eye squinted. “Is it because of Jamie? I know how guilty I feel on that front, so I’m sure you must, too.”
“Yes, I do. Though I think I could come to terms with that in time. The bigger problem is that you’re clearly seeing someone, and I can’t just ignore that fact.”
He nods. “Look, Kiki, I know our timing has been lousy so far, but I want to make this work between us. Yes, I’ve been seeing someone, but it’s very casual, and I just need a little time to straighten things out with her.”
And while I was waiting for him to straighten things out, would I be hoping for the phone to ring, like I’ve been doing constantly overthe past days, wondering where he was and who he was with and when he’d finally surface? I’ve begun to worry that being with Sam could mean lots of frustration in the short run, and real heartache down the road.
“Sam, I wish it could work out with us, too,” I say. “I feel even more strongly about you than I did months ago. But I now see that some of the very things that attracted me to you could spell doom for the two of us. I love that, for a guy who spends a lot of time with numbers, you’re kind of a free spirit. You don’t like being pinned down. But I need something more stable in my life right now, especially after everything that’s happened.”
He looks off, pressing his lovely fingers lightly against his mouth, and then glances back at me. “I have to respect how you feel, Kiki. But I think you might have the wrong read on me, and I wish I could change your mind.”
I manage a small smile. “Maybe we can talk about it some more after a little time has passed.”
Once we’ve said our goodbyes and Sam leaves, I double-check all the locks and head upstairs. Fortunately, I’m so utterly exhausted, I fall asleep instantly.
33
IARRIVE BACK IN NEW YORK THE NEXT DAY AT AROUND NOON.After dropping off my suitcase and tote bags at my apartment, I return the rental car, buy groceries, and take a stroll along the East River. I need the exercise—I’d gotten next to none in Connecticut—but I also thought that a walk would help me feel grounded in the city again. And it does. After days of endless fields and barns and silos, it’s good to gaze across at the Queens skyline and watch tugboats pull barges along the sparkling gray river.
When I’d called Megan on the drive home, she offered to fix me dinner, but I asked if she’d mind coming to my apartment tonight instead, explaining that I’d feel better in my own little cocoon. Which is true, but I also wanted to make sure it was just the two of us. I like Colin, her live-in boyfriend, a lot, but I’m not up for a group conversation.
Besides, there’s something I need to ask Megan alone, without anyone else in the room. Something about Jamie.
She arrives at my place at six thirty on the dot. I’d given her a partial update from the car, but as soon as I’ve poured us each a glass of wine and she has her legs tucked beneath her on the couch, I fill in the remaining gaps.
“Will you have to go back up there anytime soon?” she asks, looking concerned. “I mean, because of the case?”
“I gave the police an official statement before I left today. Then I guess it all depends on whether Tori and Liam plead not guilty and the case goes to trial. But surely if that happens, it won’t be for at least a year. As for Taylor, when I brought him up today, the cops didn’t look surprised, so they might have already figured it all out. I guess if the DNA definitely points to him, he would be taken into custody in Florida and extradited to Connecticut.”
“Wow, so there’s still a lot up in the air.”
I nod, then excuse myself and fetch the rotisserie chicken I bought earlier and set it on the table next to a simple green salad, a baguette, and a large, decadent wedge of Brie. Since it seems we’ve talked about nothing other than me lately, I beg Megan over dinner for details about her own life these days. She shares some news about her parents and sister and also tells me about a trip to Costa Rica she and Colin are planning for November. But soon she’s circling back to me.
“You must be so proud of yourself, Kiki,” she says. “You ignored the doubters, me included, and worked like hell to make sure the truth eventually came out.”
“Thanks for saying that, Meg—though there’s one moment in all this that I’d prefer to forget.”
