“I want you, and I’m terrified everything you said to me during the last three days meant nothing. That everything you said was lip service.” She pressed her fingers to her temples until they hurt. “I’ve been in my head over it, and when I woke up this morning to freaking Dex collecting me like I’m an overdue homework assignment, made me think that none of it mattered to you.”
A muscle jumped in his granite jaw as he regarded her with hard, black eyes.
“Whelp, brother, I’m going to leave this in your capable hands.” Sean squeezed her shoulder as he passed. “Lovely seeing you as always, Vanessa.”
Their stare-down lasted until Jordan finally broke. Gripping her arm, he led her up the gym’s main staircase, past rows of ellipticals and stationary bikes, to a modest office.
He closed the door behind them and immediately pinned her to the wall, his forearms braced on either side of her head, eyes sharp and blistering.
Then he kissed her. And kissed her. Then kissed her some more, until she wasn’t sure where she was, or remembered anything she’d said downstairs.
When he finally released her, they were both gasping for air. “My turn to talk, princess. And I’d appreciate it if, for once, you’d just listen.”
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
Of all the people on the planet, why did it have to be her? Why couldn’t he quietly live the rest of his life without the entanglement of these…feelings? Why couldn’t the universe leave him alone to do his penance in solitude? But no, somehow he’d been gifted her, and it was the biggest curse and sweetest blessing he could have asked for.
This woman was killing him. At this rate, she’d get the job done in no time.
“This is hard for me,” he admitted.
Her eyes narrowed to slits, her pliant desire gone. “Hard foryou?” Her cheeks grew pink with anger. “No one asked you to take this on. Okay, ignore that.” She raised her hand between them. “I know my brother-in-lawmadeyou babysit me, but you didn’thaveto—” She wriggled in his grip as he tightened it.
“It’s hard for me withyou.”
She licked her lips. “That’s not much better, Zeus.”
He barked out a strangled laugh, then laid his forehead against hers. God, this woman.
“With how Ifeelabout you, Vanessa.” He shifted, and hismouth found the soft underside of her jaw. “It’s hard to control these feelings I can’t even name. I want to lock you away in my beach house and never let you go. But I also want to watch you chase your dreams. I want to see you succeed and shine. But the thought of you being hurt kills me. It fucking tortures me, night and day. I hate that I can’t be everywhere you are, keeping you safe.” His eyes locked on hers. “I’d do anything for you, because there is no prison worse than a world where you don’t exist.”
Her hair fell in wild waves, like she’d raced across town to get to him, all because she thought he wasn’t coming with her to New York. He didn’t want to think too hard about what that meant.
“Did you really think I’d leave you now? Didn’t I promise I’d always protect you?”
Her gaze fluttered away.
“Eyes on me, princess.” When they returned to meet his, he said, “As long as I’m breathing, you’re safe with me. I’m coming to New York, and anywhere else you’re going until we catch this fucker. Even then, I’ll still be with you. I’ll go anywhere with you. Everywhere. As long as you want me. Is that clear?”
When she nodded, he eased back fractionally, but she followed him, closing the distance, clutching the front of his shirt like letting go hurt more than holding on. And God, he knew the feeling.
“Then why didn’t you stay last night? And why weren’t you there this morning?” Her expression was dark and…hurt.
His heart stammered. Blood roared in his ears as the truth settled. He’d left her. All the hours he’d spent in this godforsaken office drawing up safety and security measures. Another sleepless night pouring over contingency plans hethought would keep her safe. All the fear he’d had that someone was still out there hunting her, but here she stood and the only one who was hurting her now was him.
When would he learn that distance from her wasn’t the answer? For either of them.
What a fucking idiot. His palms cradled her cheeks before he kissed her forehead. When he drew back, he pinned her with his gaze. “I’m sorry.”
Vanessa attempted to look away but he held firm.
“I shouldn’t have left. I thought I was doing the right thing. I—” Words faded into the rush of his emotions.
Vanessa used the opening to thump her fists against chest. “You’re such a jerk.” Her voice cracked when she said, “Leaving me alone last night was shitty.”
Her fingers curled, her nails pressing into his shirt and then his skin painfully, and he welcomed her anger. Deserved it.
“I’m so fucking sorry,” he murmured as he kissed her tears. As complicated as it was—how he felt about her coupled with the work he must do to protect her—there was nothing else to say but that. The lines were blurring rapidly, but he couldn’t afford to make these kinds of mistakes. She was too important.
