And suddenly, the weight of the possible consequences fell, like a pall, around them.
Joel started to pull out.
“Wait,” Lucy said, tightening her knees around him.
He looked at her, gray eyes haunted with regret, for so much more than not having a condom at present.
“I—” What? What was she going to say? She’d opened her mouth, hoping a solution would come out. It did not.
“Do you have something?” Joel asked, a flicker of hope lighting the gray.
Lucy shook her head and frowned.
He matched it with one of his own. “Are you on—areyou—?” He wasn’t a man who got awkward, but she knew what he was trying to ask, and felt bad for asking.
The onus of protection shouldn’t have been on her.
She shook her head again. “I’m not on the pill.” A fact she’d never regretted until this very moment. “You could pull out?” God, maybe she really hadn’t had a sex ed class in her life?
Joel dropped his head into her shoulder again and groaned. “Lucy, I can’t take that risk right now, I’m not—” He didn’t finish his sentence. Instead, he started with another. “The happiest day of my life was when I woke up married to you. And the second was when you showed me those two lines on that test.” He pressed his forehead against her collarbone, his voice catching. “I told you the other day that if I ever have another, I want it to be with you, but right now—” He swallowed. “We’re not ready.”
Lucy shifted beneath him as tears and the truth burned her eyes. A hiss sounded against her cheek.
“Christ. Wait, don’t move.” He pulsed dangerously inside her. “I have to pull out.”
“Joel—” She was so torn between knowing he was right and wanting him to be wrong.
When he feathered a kiss along her brow, she sighed, and he withdrew.
“Wait,” she whispered, running her hands over his warm torso. Her fingers danced over his heartbeat, then she splayed her hands over his pecs and gave him a push.
No way was this night ending like this.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
What the hell was she doing?Joel thought as Lucy wiggled, shimmied, and maneuvered until she was out from under him. Lucy seldom took control in the bedroom, so when she did, he let her do her thing, and apparently, she was on a mission, because she didn’t stop until Joel found himself sitting on the edge of the bed with Lucy standing between his splayed knees.
“You look like a woman with a plan, Mrs. Morgan.” The prefix had been a slip, and he watched her closely to gauge her reaction.
A sensual smile spread across her tantalizing lips, and he almost gripped himself to keep from coming.
“Call me that again. See what happens.”
Oh fuck, she was up to play that game? Fine, tonight he could take it.
“Mrs. Morgan.” He dipped his finger through her still soaking core, then brought it to his mouth to lick it clean. “Even tastes like mine.”
Lucy’s lips parted in a shocked gasp, and a fleeting sense of victory shot through him. But then she lowered herself toher knees until she was on the floor in front of him, glancing up at him through lowered lashes. “Choke me with it.”
Before he could respond, she opened her mouth around his straining cock, circling the tip of her tongue around the head, before taking him all the way into her mouth. She moaned before popping her mouth off again. “You taste like me.” She licked around his shaft once more. “I love it.”
“Why?” Suddenly, he needed the answer more than he needed her to finish, and that was saying something.
Lucy considered, as she teased his cock with shallow strokes of her tongue, as if she was licking her flavor off him. “It reminds me of how connected we are.” She stroked him gently. “And how safe I am with you.”
The tension he hadn’t even realized he was holding dissipated from his chest, and he wove his hands through her hair as she worked him down to the base of her throat.
Testing her, he pushed his hips forward. She made a gagging sound, so he reassured her by stroking his palm down her silky mass of waves. “Breath through it, Luciana,” he coached. “I remember how well you can take it.”
