“You said someone hurt you,” he gritted out. “Is that why you always have this anger inside you?” His words set off a fire in her belly, like acid burning.
Nausea churned as painful memories hovered at the edges of her brain.
“Did someone touch you when you didn’t want them to?” He barely got the words through his clenched teeth, but when they were spoken, they fired across the ring at her like daggers. “Did you think it was him tonight? Were you out to finally get your revenge?”
“I—” Staggering, she took a few steps back. Words choking her. Tears now so thick she could hardly see him.
But he didn’t stop. He advanced, his blurry figure coming closer, moving in on her. She raised her fists in a defensive-ready position.
“You couldn’t fight back, could you?” He kept advancing. “And you’ve spent every day since hating yourself for it. Haven’t you?”
The bandage pulled, tore.
“Haven’t you!” Sean yelled.
“Yes!” she screamed back as she threw a right jab. Her fist hit his training pad with a loudthwack.
“Again!” he shouted so loudly it vibrated through her, and his harsh, enraged voice unleashed something inside her.
She struck out again. Then again. Over and over, harder and harder. Sean held steady, absorbing her blows easily. She was so weak against him. Why was she still so weak? Her muscles strained with exertion. Her breath came in loud, harsh grunts, but she didn’t stop. All the memories, all the fear, all the anger poured out of her through her fists.
Memories assaulted her. Bruising hands hurting her body. Horrible words lashing her ears. Pain burning her sensitive flesh.
This time, she didn’t shove the memories to the back of her mind. This time, she let them come at her full force. The anger surging through her fueling her with a strength that finally gave her the ability to fight back with everything she had. Her fists pounded, her legs kicked, and all her movements merged in one fluid, ferocious attack.
Reality and memory became one.
“Get off me!” she screamed at Ethan’s body looming over her. “Ihateyou.” A guttural noise tore from her throat, like a foreign beast had inhabited her body all this time and had finally been set free.
She shoved against the man in front of her and did what she’d wished she’d done that dark night. She fought with all her strength. A scream of agony rose from the very depth of her soul and morphed into a primal roar.
Time suspended, and with her anger as her only compass, she wasn’t sure where she was. Until her voice choked on a painfully hoarse sob, and her knees gave out. But she wasn’t falling. She was finally being caught after years of endless, aimless free-falling. Familiar arms cradled her against the warm, solid strength she now associated with comfort and safety.
“I’ve got you, Ivy. I’ve got you, sweetheart.” Sean’s husky voice broke through the haze of memories.
The monsters fled, battered and bruised, as she slowly came back to awareness.
“It’s okay. You’re okay.” Sean’s hands soothingly stroked her hair.
She realized that her face was pressed against his tear-drenched shirt, and not caring one iota, she stayed that way, focusing all her energy on his heartbeat. She counted the beats like he’d taught her to do. She wasn’t in that frat room anymore. She was with Sean.
More heartbeats.
More time passed.
More slow, even strokes up and down her back.
When she was ready, she leaned back so she could look up into his dark eyes, and in them she saw a deep, penetrating emotion. She realized it hadn’t been anger she’d seen in them before. It had been fear. She’d scared him when she went into that alley tonight.
“You back?” he asked, voice thick and rough.
Ivy nodded. She was back. And never wanted to be anywhere but surrounded by his warm embrace.
CHAPTERTWENTY-TWO
“Ithought it was him.” Ivy’s voice sounded muffled against Sean’s shirt, but he didn’t ask her to repeat herself, and she was grateful for that.
Sitting on the floor of the ring, he held her on his lap, cocooned in his warmth.
