“Destruction is not allowed on the path of the soul.” Given its tone of voice, this is something I should have been aware of.
I curse under my breath and wrap the shadowshard in a piece of cloth before I place it in the satchel. Should I bring the brace? No, even though it’s great for blocking the use of magic, something tells me that’s not what I want. My fingers brush against the cool glass jar gifted by the dark-eyed lady. She gave it to me when she told me to seek out this place. Maybe it will be of value. It can’t hurt, and frankly, unless I want to bring a piece of clothing, I’m out of options.
I stare down at my naked body, my fingers trailing the silvery scar on my lower abdomen. If not for the multitude of scars, it would be hard to remember my days in Bronich, covered to my fingertips. How is it that no more than three moons ago, my blisters and pain were the amusement of the party? With everything that has happened, it feels like a lifetime ago, if not another life entirely.
With a tight grip on the glass jar, I cautiously make my way toward the open tunnel. Darkness obscures whatever lies on the other side from my view. Stealing one final glance at my belongings, I gather my courage and take a step into the unknown.
THE DARKNESS SWALLOWS ME ONCE more as I walk through the tunnel. There’s no light to be seen, not even in the distance, but the cave walls are narrow enough for me to graze their edges if I reach my arms out, and so I walk, fingers brushing the rough walls for orientation. Its resemblance to a birth channel is not lost on me.
Welcome to your rebirth, Laïna.
After what feels like an eternity, I step out into a spacious cave. With one glance around, I instantly want to retreat back into the dark embrace of the tunnel. Hundreds of candles illuminate the cave, their flickering flames casting dancing shadows across my naked body, but that isn’t what has me on edge. The mirrors are.
I’ve always struggled to face myself, and the endless reflections of the cave walls make me dizzy and sick to my stomach. Closing my eyes, I shut out the disorienting images, but instead, I end up tripping on the uneven cave floor. Stumbling forward, I fall to my knees and narrowly avoid dropping the glass jar. Holding it tight, I let out a curse—then quickly apologize for swearing in such a sacred place.
Way to go, Laïna.You’re off to a great start.
On my knees, I study the engravings etched into the cave floor, brushing the glyphs and numbers with my fingertips. Soft rays of light strike my face as I move forward, and I lift my gaze toward the hole in the ceiling. The circular opening is small, but it allows some of the soft moonlight to stream down into the cave. It also lets me know the Mi’Awal Moon is not in position yet. The way the moon’s rays hit the diagram on the cave floor tells me as much. It’s close though. There can’t be more than a quarter of a bell left at most. I rub my lower back, trying to ease the sharp, persistent ache. If only I knew what I’m supposed to do.
A fleeting movement in my peripheral vision grabs my attention, and I instinctively turn my head to look, only to instantly wish I hadn’t.
Defeat hits me in my core. I should have known that they wouldn’t just let me walk in and gather my soul shards. Never mind that thepieces were mine to begin with. No one seems to pay that little fact much heed. I want to kick and scream at myself for being so utterly stupid. How on Rea did I ever believe thatI, a human who’s barely made a single decision for myself my entire life, could outsmart a god? I could have had it all. Life. Freedom. But I made the wrong choice, and now I will pay for it.
“You made it.” Aster’s voice is soft.
“So did you.” And now I’ll die, and so will Seniia and Vilder. All because of my stupid, stupid mistake. How could I even for a second think that I could have it all?
“I did.” His face gives nothing away.
“Then what are you waiting for?” I scowl at him. Why is he just standing there? “Although I honestly cannot fathom what difference a couple pieces of my soul will do to your power.”
His jaw ticks, but he says nothing.
“Is that how you gods stay alive?” I continue. “By devouring human souls?” I might as well get some answers before I die. “And you criticize your brother for drawing powers from the Void. Hypocrites, are we?” I rub my aching back. Why didn’t I ask Seniia for a healing before I came in here? Not that it matters anymore. Eternal rest will take care of that.
Aster flinches slightly at the mention of his brother, but otherwise, he shows no reaction. He just continues to stare at me, his golden eyes locked with mine. If I didn’t know better, I’d say he was struggling to contain himself.
“Got nothing to say for yourself?”
His eyes flicker away, only to sweep across my body with a slowness that makes me painfully aware of my nakedness.
Cheeks burning, I do my best to sit in a way that covers me, but it’s futile.
“Who did that to you?” His voice is tight with barely suppressed fury.
“Did what? Took my clothes off? That was me. I’m sorry if my nakedness appalls you, but I wasn’t allowed to enter this cave unless I did so.” I’ve seen his standards. It’s not me.
“Not your clothes,” he snaps. “Your scars.”
I stare at him, dumbfounded. Then I glance down at my naked body and the burn marks lining the insides of my arms and legs, where the skin is at its thinnest and hurt the most.
“I’m surprised you don’t know. You have no trouble infiltrating my mind, from what I remember.”
“I don’t—Void!” He shakes his head, exasperated, as if he’s explained this too many times. “You would have had to think about it.”
That makes sense.
“I was property,” I say, unsure why I bother to answer him. When he just continues to stare at me, I add, “Braced.” I lift my left arm for emphasis. “My master thought commanding me to burn myself with hot coal was great entertainment for his guests, and it seems he was right, because they kept coming back, and he kept commanding me to do so.” I stare at my hands, my voice thinning to a whisper. “They would bet money on how long it would take before I would scream out in pain. I didn’t want to give them the pleasure, so I pushed myself until I passed out instead.” I don’t meet his eyes; I have no need of his condescending sympathy.
