With his hand in mine, I let him take us back to the kitchen.
The food had been discarded, and Jae and Rick stopped their conversation when they saw us enter the room.
I ignored their intense gazes and focused on the fact that Jae was holding up a lighter.
“I realize it’s not really the right occasion to be lighting a candle,” Jae said as he flicked on the lighter and held it to the number one candle on the cake. “And there’s not some song to sing, or a wish to make, but I do have a small speech. I just wanted to say that I’m proud of you, brother. I’ll never forget how happy I was, how much I admired your strength when you finally,fucking finally,let me back into your life, and accepted help. I love you, brother. Cheers to an incredible year and many more to come.”
Enoch walked around the island and pulled Jae into a hug. He murmured something in his ear and Jae chuckled, squeezing him with a groan and rocking back and forth for a moment. Jaesighed as he released Enoch and my stomach flipped with nerves as Rick started to speak.
“I know it was a difficult first year, I know just how hard you worked to get to this point and I’m incredibly happy for you, Nox. It’s been a privilege to get to know you and to be your sponsor, to guide you on this sober journey of life and I look forward to continuing to be your support when you need it.”
With Rick’s speech over, they shared a quick hug and then all eyes landed on me.
“Um,” I cleared my throat, grateful that the island was blocking their view as I swiped my sweaty palms against my sweatpants. My heart raced, a lightheaded feeling making me lean into the counter for support. “You have the most incredible heart. I know that I hurt you, that I broke a piece of it. But I am so glad that you were strong enough to fix it, and that you landed right here in Anchorage. That you found me. So I can tell you how proud I am of the man you’ve become in the last five years. It’s…It’s an honor to get to call you mine and to be apart of your life. So, thank you. For choosing to see the good in yourself and for never giving up.”
Those three heavy words zapped in the air around us like an electrical current as he scooped me into a hug, my feet briefly leaving the ground as he leaned back and squeezed me tight.
“I love you, baby,” he whispered into my ear with conviction. “I love you forever. And I’m so happy you’re mine too.”
He set me on the ground to kiss me and the room melted away as he molded his lips with mine. The room spun, and I was grateful that he was something solid to hold onto, as I stared at his smiling face.
“Not to rush, but the candle is getting wax everywhere,” Jae said.
Nox nodded, releasing me and he blew the flame out. Jae cut into the cake, serving everyone agenerousslice and he motioned for us to sit down on the couch.
I took the corner seat beside Enoch and in the lull of silence as everyone took a bite of the cake, I took my opportunity to clear the air.
“I want to apologize for shouting at you. And, um, for oversharing some personal details that you didn’t need to hear about.”
Rick waved his fork in the air in a dismissive gesture, “All good. I’ve been an AA sponsor for eleven years; I’ve seen and heard just about everything. Nothing phases me anymore.”
I hoped to hell he’d never heard anything like what I just revealed but nodded anyways.
“So, K-dramas. Jae here was telling me it was a little bit of a tradition for you guys?”
Nox nodded with a smile. “Yeah. It was kind of ourthing. Watching tv series together.”
The conversation moved easily after that, Rick, Jae and Nox discussing their favorite shows, and Jae adding several recommendations from Rick to a list he was compiling for us to watch together. The cake was thoroughly complimented by everyone, and I was relieved to hear the praise. It was a boxed cake, so I wasn’t expecting it to turn out gross, but it definitely made me smile regardless.
I’d managed to eat most of my slice, sudden hunger taking over as I realized I hadn’t eaten anything except for the few chips I’d taste-tested the salsa with. After a while, when the conversation lapsed, Rick sighed and pulled a small box from his pocket.
He handed it across the couch to Enoch who tentatively retrieved it. I watched Enoch’s smile stretch into a grin as he opened it and looked inside. It was a one-year coin. I couldn’tread the text on it from here, but whatever it said made Enoch happy.
“Thank you,” he said, leaning over to hug Rick. “It’s perfect.”
“You earned it,” Rick said with a shrug. “I, um, I’ve gotta get heading home, but thanks for letting me join in commemorating this milestone, Nox. Good to see you, Jae.” Rick stood, turned to face the couch and looked at me. “It was so nice to meet you, Emory. Keep up the hard work.”
His sincere gaze made me fidget, and I forced myself to smile and nod.
Enoch walked him out and I sighed into the couch once they were out of sight.
Jae grabbed the remote, scooting over to sit a foot away from me.
“Wanna help me pick something out?” he asked, with a hopeful grin.
I shrugged, “Sure.”
Jae studied me for a moment before facing the TV and flipping to one of their streaming platforms.
