“Sort of.”
His hands started moving again, gently stroking from my waistband to the edge of my bra.
“Why were you hurting yourself?”
My cheeks heated to another degree, and I drew my arm up and across my face in an attempt to hide my shame.
“I dunno.”
His hands didn’t stop or try to move my arm away, but the questions kept going. “I think you do.”
I nodded and tried to just focus on his hands and not the way my mind was replaying scenes of all those flashbacks that had played in my mind that day.
“Do you usually hurt yourself when you’re having a panic attack?”
“No.”
“So, this was the first time?”
I sighed again in irritation but relented by deeming his question a response. “Yes.”
“So, what was the trigger?”
I ground my teeth together, again trying to focus on his hands and the way he was making me feel.
“What do I get if I tell you?”
I heard him smirk and waited.
“A kiss?”
I rolled my eyes and removed my arm from my face. “I definitely should get more than a singular kiss if you’re forcing me to be honest.”
“Alright. As many kisses as you would like, then. Better?”
I chewed my lip letting the tension build before finally nodding my agreement.
“It wasn’t anything you did. I just couldn’t get my brain to shut up. I was reliving the day my brother died. I was there when it happened.”
I don’t think Enoch was expecting any of those words to come out of my mouth because his hands abruptly stopped and he stared at me, lips parted.
“Fuck me,” he muttered.
“That can be arranged,” I smirked.
“Stop deflecting. That’s heavy shit, Shiloh.” He gave me a stern look and I rolled my eyes. “Yousawhim commit suicide? What happened?”
He blew out a breath before resuming his caressing. His brown eyes still held my stare as I battled with myself. Sharing details with him would cause a crack in the concrete wall guarding my secrets. I didn’t know how much pressure it could take before it crumbled against the weight of everything inside.
“Gunshot to the head,” I whispered.
I watched Enoch swallow thickly and his hands stilled, his fingertips digging into my skin.
“Fuck.” It was barely a whisper but with the complete silence surrounding us it felt like a shout. “Shiloh, that’s…that’s horrifying. No wonder you had a panic attack.”
In some move I probably shouldn’t have been so impressed with, he had switched our bodies around so that he was lying on his back and I was now straddling his hips. Enoch’s arms wrapped around my back until we were lying chest to chest. Even his legs folded over my own until every part of me was cocooned in his hold.
“Oh my gosh, Shy. Just…just let me hold you for a while.”
