None of the women seemed uncomfortable, all the children looked healthy and full of energy, and I couldn’t even find a fault in their idealist lifestyles. Everyone seemed happy. And other than that strange goodbye from Beth, I had a good time with the women and kids.
“Olivia?” I flinched, his hand moving down my head to the back of my neck.
“Pardon?”
“You know I’m not upset, right? About the prayer.”
I glanced around, clenching my nails into my fist as I realized we had made it out of the compound and were on the freeway already.
“Yeah. I understand. Beth explained what I did wrong and that it’s all forgiven now.”
He sighed, squeezing my neck before returning his grip to the wheel. “Good, good. I don’t want you to be dissuaded from joining us for church on Sunday.”
I licked my lips, stalling for the right answer.
“I would really love another chance to learn more about how I can better myself.”
I could feel Theo’s bright smile.
“It was such a blessing to have met you, Olivia. And I hope that you were able to feel welcome in my family’s home this evening. Did you connect with anyone in particular?”
“Yes. Cassidy, Beth and spent most of the night talking.”
“I’m so happy that you were able to connect with two of our lovely sisters. Cassidy was like you and was homeless when our paths crossed. She met her husband in the church shortly after and has been happily married since.”
I nodded.
“It’s hard to shed a life lived in sin, and no one expects you to be perfect. God seeks out those with the most flaws and accepts them with grace and forgiveness. The important thing is that you learn from mistakes and move towards a future that brings you closer to Him.”
“How do I do that? This world is so focused on money and success, but they were telling me tonight that God says I am designed to serve my husband and to create a family. How can I do that when the world expects me to work or go to college for a higher paying career?”
“You’re right. And that’s exactly why my father is involved in changing our culture. We’ve strayed so far from the values that matter: God, family and obedience. Our society is forcing women to lose their femininity, their true natures of nurturing, their duty as a wife and mother. That’s why Eden is just that…a haven tucked away in a world of corruption. And if you want, there can be a place for you too. A family. We can give you a purpose to fulfill as a daughter of Eve.”
I chewed my cheek, clammy and fighting the urge to shake my leg.
“Think about it, Olivia. I’ll be praying for you and that God will lead you towards the right path.”
I nodded, unable to speak.Holy fucking shit. One fucking night and he’s already telling me I can join? Is he interested in me though, or just the idea of me joining his church congregation? Was this how quickly everyone was asked to join?
“Have a listen to last week’s sermon.”
He didn’t fidget long with his phone before it was playing through the car speaker with the sound of his father’s voice. I focused on each mile marker on the road, counting them as they passed to distract myself from the bubbling anxiety in my chest.
Twenty-Six
November 11, Thursday
Shiloh
Ispent most of the night contemplating my future. I’d never wanted children, never even considered getting married one day. But maybe this was the best I was going to get. Maybe it was what I deserved. Maybe if I lived like they did, I’d be absolved of all my sins, I’d get a chance at some peace and happy. And most importantly, I’d be keeping my friends safe.
I must have fallen asleep, because I startled awake to the sound of my phone vibrating against my cheek. I grabbed it, blindly swiping until I answered.
“Yeah?”
“I’m here.”
I groaned, sitting up and rubbing my eyes. “Ok.”
