“Go for it, man,” Kylen says. “You don’t have anything to lose. You’re already in love with her. It can’t hurt any more, can it?”
“Reality will hurt more,” he says. “Right now, it’s all in my head. But if she sends me away…”
“Keep in mind that she may want to be alone for now,” I advise. “You have to listen to what she actually wants and obey her wishes. Don’t be pushy.”
Leo nods again. “Don’t be pushy. Okay. Got it.” He takes a large gulp of air, causing his chest to puff up. “Going in.”
We all hold our breaths and watch Leo hesitantly walk over to her. Lilah is tapping on her phone, and when she feels a presence next to her, she slowly lifts her head. I don’t know what Leo says because his voice is above a whisper, but it causes a small smile to break out on her face. She nods and removes herbag that was sitting on the seat beside her. Leo lowers himself next to her with a relieved and incredulous expression on his face.
I smile at Kylen. “He’s so cute.”
“I know. I hope things work out between them. And if not? I hope he at least makes a new friend.”
“Something tells me he won’t give up on her so easily.”
Ryder chuckles. “Definitely not.”
The bus finally starts to move. I look out the window at our school, watching it grow smaller and smaller as we drive away. I know it’s weird to say this, but I miss it already. I feel this way every time I leave for summer break. This school has changed my life so much.
“What are you thinking?” Kylen asks in a soft tone.
I blink and look at him. “What?”
“You were gazing out the window like you were lost in your thoughts. I was wondering what you could possibly be thinking about. How pretty the school looks covered in all that snow?”
“It does look pretty,” I admit. “But that’s not what I was thinking about.”
He nods, his eyes expectant like he’s dying to know what occupied my mind. I’m reminded of the days at camp when I slowly opened up to him. He just had this openness and warmth that made me feel like I could trust him. I don’t think I’ve opened my heart to him since we renewed our friendship here at Harrington. I loved how he shared his thoughts and feelings with me last Friday on the porch swing at Fiona’s party. I want to trust him just as I did at camp.
“I was just remembering how lonely I was before I met Carly and Sophie,” I admit, dropping my eyes to my knees. “I know we spoke about this at camp, but sometimes it creeps up on me. It’s like I still can’t believe how great my life is now. It sucked so much in middle school and the beginning of freshman year.”
Kylen nods. He knows exactly how I felt all those years. Even though he didn’t experience that because he made friends with the guys in elementary school, he was always so understanding. Maybe because he knows what it feels like to be lonely as well, since he lost his parents.
“Leaving school reminds you of that?” he asks.
I nod, my eyes still on my knees. “I guess the irrational part of me worries that once we leave the place where my life got better, it’ll just get ruined. I know that’s crazy.”
He shakes his head. “It’s not crazy. I feel the same way when I leave the cemetery after I visit my parents. As though once I leave, I’ll move on with my life and completely forget about them.”
I raise my eyes and smile. “I guess you do understand.”
“I think I’ve always been able to understand you, Raven.”
I smile shyly as my cheeks heat up.
A few seconds of silence pass. Then Beck yells, “Ky, where are the snacks at? I’m starving here. They didn’t feed us this morning.”
“They’re going to feed us at the lodge, bozo,” Jasper yells back.
“I’m supposed to starve for two hours?”
Shaking his head with a smile, Kylen unzips his backpack and unloads an assortment of snacks. He tosses four bags behind him, then produces a bag of ketchup potato chips. “I didn’t forget our awesome lyricist.” He dangles it before me.
“You didn’t have to do that.”
“Of course I did.”
I take it from him and smile. “Thanks. I guess I’m a little hungry.” I open the bag and hold out a chip. “Want?”
