He waits patiently as I get the courage to ask the questions that plague my thoughts.
“Did I do something? Did you just stop loving me?”
“No, baby, it wasn’t you.” He pulls me closer and kisses my hair. “I loved you so much. It was all me. I got caught up in my own head and made a huge mistake. One I will always regret.”
“Did you meet someone else when you got back to school?” I ask quietly, picking a loose thread on the blanket.
“Fuck no, Hannah. I promise I was always faithful to you,” he says with conviction.
“Okay.” I believe him, he has no need to lie to me after all this time. Just because my dad was unfaithful, doesn’t mean Logan was too.
“I told myself that you left because my life wasn’t what you signed up for,” I whisper, nibbling my lower lip.
“What do you mean?” He twists me around on his lap so I’m facing him. “Talk to me.”
“We made plans. Plans that didn’t include my dad dying and me being forced to quit school and move back to Emerley so I could take care of my mom. I know you didn’t sign up for that – fuck, I didn’t either – so I can almost understand if that was the reason. My life suddenly got really messy.”
“Oh, baby, no.” He shakes his head as his chocolate brown eyes search mine.
“Well, that’s the story I told myself. Even if it was a lie, it’s what I needed to believe so I could move on.”
“I’m so sorry, Hannah,” he whispers. “I would do anything to go back in time and do everything differently. I hurt you. I left when you needed me. And I have regretted it every single day since.”
“I know. You need to know that things got a lot worse before they got better. I’m not telling you that to make you feel guilty, it’s just something you should know. I still hold on to a lot of trauma from that time of my life. If you don’t think that is something you are ready for, I’ll understand. We can stick to being just friends and pretend I didn’t kiss you the other night.”
“I promise I’m not going anywhere. And I haven’t stopped thinking about that kiss. It’s been playing on loop for the past two days.”
I smile softly. “Me too.” Maybe I’m being reckless not asking more questions, but I am so tired of the past controlling my future. I just need a fresh start, a chance to try again.
“We can take it slow if you want. We’ve got nothing but time.”
“I’m done with slow. I’ve missed you so much, Logan. I didn’t realize how much until you came home.”
Gathering my hair, he pushes it to the side and nuzzles into my neck. My entire body shivers with need as he bands his arm around my waist and pulls me further into his chest. I tilt my head to meet his eyes and hold his stare. He watches me for a beat as if to give me a chance to change my mind. Brushing his fingers along my jaw, he tilts my face up to his. This moment feels fragile and for a second neither of us moves. Tentatively, his soft lips touch mine and the world around us blurs as our breaths mingle. I can feel his hesitation, as if he’s waiting for a sign to go on.
My heart begins to race as I lean in and deepen our kiss. It is unhurried with a silent promise. As his hands roam up and down my back, I can feel his impressive erection grow through his pants. My fingers slip through his hair, and he groans into my mouth.
The wind is rustling the leaves in the trees, and I can hear the faint call of an owl but the only thing that matters is the taste of him on my tongue and the way his hands hold me close, fingers digging into my hips. I feel my panties dampen as the heat of his body overwhelms my senses. Nobody has ever made me feel like this except Logan.
The way he kisses me feels like he’s trying to make up for lost time. It’s all consuming, and I can’t get enough as I slowly rock back and forth on his lap. My hands wander and he inhales sharply when my fingers graze his warm skin at the waistband of his pants.
“Should we go inside?” he murmurs against my lips but doesn’t stop kissing me.
When I don’t respond, he reluctantly breaks the kiss and insists, “We should go inside.” His hands drag slowly up my back, making their way under my hair to the nape of my neck.
“Yeah.” I nod breathlessly.
Cupping my face, his thumb brushes across my cheek. His eyes search mine. “Are you sure? If we do this, there’s no turning back. I won’t be able to let you go again.” His voice is rough with need, but I can hear the vulnerability behind his words.
Swallowing hard, I say, “I don’t want to stop. I don’t want to be scared.”
Standing, he scoops me up bridal style into his arms. I bury my face in the crook of his neck and inhale his spicy scent deeply as his grip tightens around my thighs. Pushing his way through the back door, he adjusts my body in his arms so he can shut and lock it behind us.
Kicking off his shoes, he quickly carries me through the dimly lit living room straight into my bedroom. Gently, he sets me down on the floor and backs me into the room. “Can I undress you?”
I nod.
“I’m going to need your words, okay baby?”
