The house feels so empty without Dad here to fill it. There’s no longer the boisterous sound of his laugh when he tells a ridiculous joke just to make mom smile. There’s no smell of homemade tomato sauce simmering in the kitchen while he hums along to oldies on the radio. He will never peek his head into my room late at night and wish me sweet dreams. There are countless moments that I took for granted. Despite my lingering anger and sense of betrayal, I miss him so much.
The funeral home has allowed us to use their large family room to hold a celebration of life after the service. There is no way I could host the gathering in my parents’ home and forgoingit is not an option. The good residents of Emerley have certain expectations.
There are endless flower arrangements scattered around the room and a photo montage playing across a large television screen, showcasing my father’s life. I’m not sure who put it together but it’s a lovely tribute.
My mother is currently sitting solemnly with a linen handkerchief clutched in her hand lost in her own private world, barely acknowledging the steady stream of people that stop by to pay their respects.
As a result of her silence, I am the one listening to people give words of sympathy and support. I fake smiles, awkwardly hugged way too many people and thank everyone for coming. Both of my parents are only children, and my grandparents have passed. More than once this week I wished that I had a sibling to share some of the responsibility.
“Here, drink this.” Logan appears at my side, twists the lid off and hands me a bottle of water. I smile at him after taking a long refreshing swallow.
“Thank you. Can you believe this crowd?” I whisper. He looks handsome in the navy suit and brown shoes that he borrowed from his dad. I feel like a train wreck in the dark grey dress I got from Megan. Like him I have nothing appropriate to wear with me. The thought of going shopping to buy something new gave me hives.
“I’m pretty sure the entire village is here. He knew a lot of people.”
It’s true. Friends, colleagues, and past clients have all been here to express their sympathy. He takes my hand and gives it a squeeze as we watch groups of people gathered in small circles drinking tea or coffee talking in hushed voices. There are sounds of subdued laughter as they recall their favourite memories.
We silently watch as Francis and Maggie deliver more baked goods to the refreshment table. Beth is speaking with a real estate agent I recognize from my dad’s office. Riot and Megan have been accosted by elderly Mrs. Wilson; probably talking about her cat.
“The room is full of hypocrites. How many of them do you think are the same ones who talked shit about him online,” I mutter, popping a mint into my dry mouth.
I’m positive there are several people here just because they are curious about the Facebook posts. They want to see if anything scandalous happens or if the other woman shows up. Can you imagine what a shit show that would be?
Just then, an irritated-looking Officer Kent enters and scans the room. When he spots me, he walks quickly straight to us.
“Logan.” He nods, acknowledging my boyfriend. Turning to me, he says, “My condolences, Hannah. I hope you don’t mind, but I met Mr. Marshal at the door and told him he should leave. I don’t want to overstep, but I didn’t think you would want to see him here today.”
“Thank you, Officer Kent. I really appreciate that.” He is right, I absolutely do not want to see that piece of garbage today or any time soon.
“Did you confirm he didn’t see the crash happen?”
“Please, call me Mason. Yes, several people talked to him at Maggie’s and, as you know, he had been online,” he sighs heavily before continuing. “The timeline from when you talked to your father on the phone, when the accident occurred, and the discovery of the car all line up. I know this is a difficult time, but if you or your mom needs anything at all, please let me know. As a friend and neighbour not as a police officer. I care about her a great deal. Your dad was a good man and a good friend.”
“Thank you, Mason.”
He nods once before leaving us and going to my mother. We watch as he crouches down and gently takes my mother’s hand and speaks to her softly. She gives him a sad smile and nods her head before he rises, kisses her cheek, and exits the way he came.
“Was that weird to you?” Logan asks as he watches their exchange.
“This entire experience is beyond weird,” I say, closing my eyes and resting my head on his shoulder. “I can’t wait for this day to be over.”
I remain in that position for a moment before I hear Logan chuckle. “She made it.”
“Who?” I ask, following the direction he’s looking.
In the centre of the room, I see Meg and Riot talking to our friend, Carson. Beside him is a tall blonde woman with two long braids hanging down her back. When she turns to look at me, I gasp and immediately burst into tears. Claire’s here.
Rushing to me, she pulls me into a tight embrace.
“Hey, girlfriend. Long time, no see. I wish it was for a better reason,” she whispers into my hair.
“How are you here?” I ask through my sobs.
Stepping back and holding both my hands, she smiles and nods her head towards Riot.
“This big guy right here. He told me to get my ass on a plane and come home. Carson picked me up from the airport and we came straight here. I’m sorry I couldn’t make it back sooner.”
None of us have seen Claire in person since the summer after we graduated high school, three years ago. Desperate to leave this small town, she took her first opportunity and ran. This is the first time she has been back, and she looks amazing. Her hair is so much longer and lighter, her skin is bronze from all the time she spends in the sun. This is so much better than FaceTime.
