Am I wrong?
I’m backed into a corner by Nero and this fucking sham marriage. Am I doing what I always do – lashing out like a caged animal, a wild heart desperate to kill the hand that feeds? I bury my face into Gabe’s hoodie, sinking into myself like a cat crouching low before it strikes.
Am I wrong?
Am I trying to love them the only way I know how to love, with claws and teeth, with possession and control?
“I told you George overheard us,” Eli says to the others. In their shared glances I catch their unease, their fear.
No, no, this isn’t love. They shouldn’t be afraid of me.
Eli smiles at me, but it’s wobbly.
“What’s going on?” I meet each of their eyes with my patented Ice Queen glare. Only Noah can hold my gaze for longer than a moment. I pull the hoodie over my knees. My armor in place, I cross the room to get all up in their grills, allowing their individual scents to reach me through the invisible bars of my cage.
I touch my finger to the August tattoo on Noah’s wrist, and even he flinches.
“I thought we were a team,” I whisper. “I thought we took an oath to protect each other, to be with each other always. And here you all are, making plans without me.”
“You made plans without us,” Noah says. He won’t look me in the eye. “You decided to marry Gabriel. That’s a pretty big thing to fucking spring on us without discussing first, especially after you told him you weren’t ready.”
“I wastryingto de-escalate the duke situation. It’s got nothing to do with what I want or what I’m ready for. In my job, I don’t always get that luxury. And besides, it didn’t work, so you can stop harping on about it and tell me what the fuck you’re all planning behind my back.”
They look at each other, guilt written all over their faces. My hands ball into fists. I want to knock their beautiful, stupid heads together until little birds dance around their skulls.
Only the ones you love can truly betray you.
“We weren’t trying to leave you out,” Eli says. “That’s exactly why we were talking. We all wanted to make sure we’re on the same page about certain things so that we can work together to be the best tribunes for you.”
“We weren’t holding a war council,” Gabriel pipes up. “Not without our favorite queen.”
“And what have you decided?”
“That Eli will go to law school,” Noah says, resting a hand on Eli’s shoulder. “He’ll learn the ins and outs of international law so he can find the best ways of circumventing it, and maybe he’ll also make some contacts that will come in handy. I’ll leverage my father’s name into a career in politics – that will give us further advantages. Gabe will quit music and work full time as your assistant. He’ll help you use social media to raise your profile in the criminal underworld, make working with the August family a desirable goal for any discerning criminal.”
My mind reels at their vision for our future, at everything they’re willing to sacrifice for me, for the glory of the August name. “You three… this is too much…”
Noah cracks that heart-melting half-smile of his, the one where a faint hint of sunshine burst through the darkness. “And we were thinking that maybe one day in the future… you and Gabriel will get married.”
My stomach contracts like I’ve taken a punch. “Let me get this straight, after all your tantrums, youwantme to marry Gabe?”
“Just for the legal benefits, and the social clout. And only if you want to, of course. The ceremony could be for all four of us,” Eli adds. “Because we’re all fucking nuts about you.”
“You all want to marry me?”
They nod.
“But Eli has to be the wedding planner,” Gabe adds. “He has very specific ideas.”
Eli’s cheeks flush with color. “All I said was that I wanted a church service, and white lilies in the bouquet, and blue flowers on the tables to match Claudia’s eyes.Youcan plan the wedding if you have a problem with—”
“Please. I’ll be too busy planning the wedding night,” Gabriel grins. “That’s my department. Noah can take care of chair bows.”
“As long as he’s not in charge of the cake,” Eli says with decisiveness.
I can’t hold it in any longer. I burst out laughing.
It’s like a cork pops inside me and healing balm pours into my veins. All the tension of the last few weeks is sloughed away by their declaration. I look at their three perfect faces – at Eli’s too-pretty smile and Noah’s coal-black eyes and Gabriel’s shit-eating grin – and I see how truly wrong I’ve been.
