I pushed the dark thought aside. I hadn’t thought something like that in a couple of months, not since I watched the flames tear through the apartment and wondered if I should throw myself upon them.I’m a survivor. I don’t give up.
But was I?Being at Derleth made me doubt everything I thought I knew, even about myself.
Our path joined others snaking around the cliffs. The paths joined and widened, and I started to notice details of the garden. Deliberate beds and niches were set into the rocks, housing weird statues and wilting plants. Nature had re-asserted herself after the garden had fallen into ruin – weeds twisted through the rocks, overtaking the beds and choking the statues.
The cold stole my breath. Bitter wind rushed up from the ocean below. Salt water misted my legs as I picked my way down the path after Quinn. Despite the cold, girls sauntered past in sleeveless dresses and towering heels.How are they not human Popsicles?I rubbed my arms through my leather jacket as I surveyed the party.
We stood on a wide, oddly-shaped terrace carved from the cliff. Students spread out along the craggy rocks, laughing and drinking from red plastic cups or passing around pipes filled with God knows what. The terrace had been set up with a dance floor along one end. No shitty playlist from someone’s phone at this elite party, but an actual live band made up of juniors I recognized from the drama department played weirdly out-of-date 90s emo music while girls swayed and ground against each other. Behind the band was an elaborate grotto carved into the rocks, inlaid with a frieze depicting satyrs and maenads in all kinds of lewd poses. A waterfall cascaded off the rock-face and trickled through a series of pools, where students bathed surrounded by hundreds of twinkling candles.
At the other end of the terrace, a stone gazebo stood on top of a rock ledge, appearing to float above the ocean. The roof had caved in, leaving the structure open to the sky. A brazier in the center held a blazing fire, and I could see students huddled around, covered with blankets and talking in low voices. In the darkness, I couldn’t make out any faces. I didn’t like not knowing where Courtney was, not when I stood this close to the edge of a precarious cliff.
I followed Quinn through a crowd, glancing back over my shoulder every few steps in case she snuck up behind me. Quinn led me straight to a folding table heaped with alcohol. He grabbed us both cups and set about mixing a couple of drinks. I watched his movements like a hawk. If he put something in my drink, I didn’t see it. But I swapped our cups around and waited until he took a sip first before I did the same.
“You’re paranoid,” he grinned, clinking his plastic cup against mine.
“I’ve seenCarrie. You and your girlfriend could have planned some humiliating stunt.”
Quinn rolled his eyes in an adorable way, and despite myself, a laugh rumbled up through my belly. “If you’re talking about Courtney, she’s not my girlfriend.”
“She believes she is. And I’m probably going over a cliff or drinking rat poison tonight because of it.”
Quinn threw his arm around me and thumped his chest. “She’ll have to get through me first.”
My heart soared, and I hated myself for being sucked in by Quinn’s charm. I wanted so badly to believe that this guy actually genuinely wanted to hang out with me. I was even starting to like the silly nickname he’d given me. But the wind bit against my bare neck and I stiffened, sliding out from under his arm. “Is there any food?”
Quinn pointed to another table, where someone had laid out platters of food. Lots of weird-looking fishy stuff on crackers, no thank you.Ooh, cocktail sausages. I popped two in my mouth.Wheeee, they’re quite spicy.
I grabbed a handful of chips and munched on them while Quinn watched, mouth agape.
I stared at him, mouth still filled with sausage and chips. “What? You never seen a girl eat before?”
Quinn whistled. “No, not really. Most of the girls here are on some annoying diet. No starch! Only two hundred calories! No sugar! Boring, boring, boring. I’ve never seen a chick plow through a bowl of chips like that.”
“Yeah, well, where I come from, you never say no to food, because you don’t know how long it will be until your next meal.” I licked salt off my fingers and reached for another cocktail sausage.
“I can’t even imagine,” he said. The way he said it, it wasn’t mean. It was just a statement of fact. He literallycouldn’t imagine, because being hungry was so far out of his realm of experience.
“I can’t imagine living the way you do, where you could have anything you possibly wanted and every opportunity at your fingertips. I can’t imagine snapping my fingers and having people jump to do my housework or make my food or get me off.”
“When you put it like that, it does sound pretty amazing,” Quinn agreed. He flashed me a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
Ah, now there’s something real behind the trickster King’s mask. “Isn’t it?”
“You want to swim?” Quinn asked, changing the subject with a swiftness I couldn’t help by notice. “The pool is fed from a natural spring. It’s actually quite toasty once you get your clothes off.”
“I’d love to swim.” The words came out too fast. It was reckless to risk taking my clothes off here, but the thought of seeing Quinn with his shirt off, in the water, all those muscles and tattoos on display… I glanced around again. Courtney was nowhere in sight. In fact, no one seemed to have noticed Quinn here with me. I dared to believe it might be okay.
Quinn grinned and grabbed my hand, dragging me to the edge of the rocks. Clothes and shoes were strewn everywhere. I peered into the water, noting the number of couples pressed together in the dark corners. In the middle of the pool, where the water was so deep the bottom was only a black abyss, Amber and Madison splashed around with a couple of guys. My chest tightened. If they were around, then Courtney and Tillie couldn’t be far away—
Quinn tugged off his jacket and laid it down on the rocks, stepping out of his jeans to reveal those lean, muscular legs. My mouth dried as he shrugged off his shirt, revealing broad shoulders and a tight, toned chest crisscrossed with tattoos. My finger flew to the burn on my wrist as he looped a finger into his boxers and tossed them aside, too.
“You coming, Hazy?” He grinned at me, enjoying himself.
I tried to stop looking, but I couldn’t. I’d never seen a guy completely naked before. And here was Quinn, standing around all tight muscle and bad-boy swagger like it was the most natural thing in the world. His cock bounced as he clambered up the rocks.How can he be that big? How can something that big fit inside a girl?
I pressed my finger into the scar as my body flushed with heat, jamming my thighs together in a vain attempt to quash the violent urge that flared inside me.I do not want to find out. That’s not why I’m here. I do not want to find out…“Quinn, wait—”
He sat on the edge of the rocks, swinging his legs, giving me ample view of that glorious cock. “Yes, Hazy?”
