Adelaide is right. This weekend has dredged up all kinds of feelings. Not only hard feelings about my father and my brother, but intense emotions about Leon too. Emotions I thought would have gone away by now.
Woodstock
Day Three
Sunday, August 17, 1969
12:15 a.m.
After confessing the gory details about my family, I leaned into Leon. “My life’s pretty complicated, huh?”
“It’s notLeave It to Beaver,” he said with his Leon laugh.
“More likeDark Shadows.”
He grinned, then took a drag of his cigarette before blowing the smoke skyward. “You should be very proud of yourself.”
“I am proud of myself. It’s about time I break free from my ...unworldliness.” I squeezed my eyes shut and gave him a bashful smile.
“It’s high time you break free of your dad,” Leon said before holding my face in his hands. He met my gaze. “I rather like your unworldliness.”
“Thank you, but I don’t.”
He let his hands slip from my cheeks. “You still haven’t told me what happened with Livy.”
“Ahh, Livy.” I looked skyward at the mention of her name. “Well ...”
I took him back to that fateful Good Friday when I’d discovered Ron in Rosie’s bed with the girl. I confessed I’d written about it in my diary and accidentally left it out for one of my nosy parents to read.
He told me his sisters had diaries. And there was no telling what they’d written about him.
But when I told him that Livy’s LSD trip had revealedshe’dbeen the one in bed with Ron, and that I had no idea they’d once had crushes on each other—until that moment—I could read the shock on his face. He hung his head when I explained they’d hidden it from me, allowing me to blame myself for Ron’s enlistment, when the fault lay with Livy.
“You’ve blamed yourself for three years?” he asked.
“See why I never want to see her again?”
He didn’t comment about that. He just asked, “Do you think your parents know it was her?”
“I doubt it. Ron refused to tell any of us who she was. That’s why Dad got so mad. But if they know now ...” I looked down, wondering if they’d found her signet ring. “Katy, bar the door.”
Leon roared with laughter, then shook his head like he’d made a mistake. “Sorry. It’s not funny. It’s just you and your Southern sayings.”
“It’s okay,” I said with a reassuring smile.
“After what you’ve told me about your dad, I’m guessing Ron having sex in the first place was a pretty hairy deal.”
“Very hairy. Sex before marriage is abigsin in our family.” As soon as I said it, I had a flash of regret. Leon thinking of me as even more of a Goody Two-shoes was unbearable. “I mean, it’s a sin as far as my parents and my church are concerned.”
“No sexual revolution going on at your house, huh?”
“Not hardly.”
“And they sure didn’t want the girl getting pregnant.”
“Heck no.”
“And now your brother’s in Vietnam because of your dad’s beliefs.” He shook his head. “Man. A puritanical army colonel. Tough combination.”
