After whipping around in my chair, I see a girl I met at freshman orientation last summer. And she’s sitting right behind me. “Mary Gaston!”
“I can’t believe I’m just now seeing you,” she whispers. “After all these months.” She starts to say something else, but the Gamma Chis are dancing onto the stage for their big Reveal. Finally, we get to learn to which sorority each of them belongs.
I pat her on the hand and whisper back, “We’ll talk in a sec.”
Someone onstage yells, “Kappa Alpha Theta.” Then all the one hundred Gamma Chis—it looks like there are at least that many—sing the entire Theta song, clapping and dancing like they’re all Theta sisters. Most of the rushees around me aren’t all that interested in the Reveal, but I’m super interested and I’m inspecting every girl up there, dying to spot Sarah.
When the song is over, about ten Gamma Chis break from the group, run to the front of the stage, and rip off their T-shirts to reveal their Theta jerseys underneath. Sarah is not one of them.
Next up is the AOPi song and like before, once the song ends, the real AOPi’s run to the front, remove their Gamma Chi T-shirts, and strip down to their AOPi jerseys. ADPi follows. My eyes are hurting from focusing this hard. I’ve been insanely curious for over a week now, imagining which sorority Sarah actually belongs to. The same routine goes on for another three sororities, and still no Sarah.
When the Alpha Delts begin their song, I remember it right away. Having made it all the way through Sisterhood there, I’d heard them sing it for their door stacks. It’s super catchy and I find myself singing along. When it ends and their Gamma Chis are bopping up to the front of the pack, I think I see Sarah. Wait… itisSarah! She’s an Alpha Delt? Oh my goodness, Sarah, you’re an Alpha Delt? I’m so happy for Ellie right now I can’t breathe. They could be sorority sisters.
When the Reveal is over, while the Gamma Chis are walking off the stage and heading back toward their groups, the Panhellenic president strolls onto the stage again. By the way everyone is screaming you’d think Ole Miss hadwon the National Championship. And she’s taking her sweet time. Come on, girl, we’re all dying here.
“Now for the moment you’ve all been waiting for,” she finally says into the mic. All the girls scream louder—if that’s possible.
“Listen up,” she yells, over all of our voices. “Once all the Gamma Chis get back to their groups they’ll be handing out your bid cards.Do not open them.Wait till your Gamma Chi tells you to do so.”
Parents and grandparents, sisters and brothers—and college boys galore—are all over the Grove, sneaking in closer to get a better view. After learning I’d been cut from Rush, I told my grandparents I wouldn’t be joining a sorority. I’m not sure which was worse, Papaw’s tears or mine. I never thought of calling them back this morning to tell them otherwise. Dammit, I wish they could be here.
Now I see Sarah rushing back to our group, waving our bid cards over her head. She’s wide-eyed and she can’t contain her smile. I’m dying to tell her that Ellie is my best friend and to watch out for her at Alpha Delt, in case she joins, but there’s too much excitement going on.
“Keep these in your hands,” she says, while handing us our small white envelopes. By the way she’s bouncing it seems she’s as pumped as we are. “I want y’all to open them at the same time.” Then she spreads out her arms and motions us to huddle in closer.
I’m staring at my envelope. The paper is thin and, if I really wanted to, I could press down hard enough to read the lettering. But I’ve come this far, waited this long, and I am not about to ruin my own surprise. Besides, I couldn’t care less which sorority’s name is inside. All I know is this might be the happiest moment of my life. I sure can’t think of another one any better. Truly, I feel as though I might burst at any second.
Sarah seems the same way—buoyant and electric—and now she has to yell because other groups have opened their bid cards and girls are already screaming. “Here we go: five, four, three, two, one.Open!”
Everyone in my group is ripping into their envelopes, but my hands are shaking so hard I can’t. Now they’re all screaming and jumping. Some are already running. And I’m still trying to slip my damn finger underneath the flap of my envelope. My heart is literally pounding like it’s trapped and begging to get out of my chest. Finally, I tear off a corner and rip the envelope inhalf. Once I’m able to pull out the card and see what’s written, my jaw hits the ground. I suck in a pound of air and gasp. Then I blink about five times, certain there’s been a mistake.
ALPHADELTABETA
CORDIALLY INVITES
CALIWATKINS
TO BECOMEA NEWMEMBER OF
SIGMAMUCHAPTER
UNIVERSITY OFMISSISSIPPI
I’m staring at my bid card in shock. Everyone in the Grove is screaming. But my mouth won’t move. I can’t make a sound. Tears spring to my eyes. When Sarah said I was a new member I never considered it would be Alpha Delt. Never-in-my-wildest-dreams never.
“Hold up your bid card, Cali.” I look up and Sarah’s directly in front of me, holding her phone at eye level. How long she’s been videoing is anyone’s guess. “Had you fooled, didn’t I?” She keeps going until I practically knock her down for a hug. “You deserve every bit of this,” she says in my ear, then pulls away. “When I told you everyone was excited about you, I knew what I was talking about. Every single girl at Alpha Delt loves you. If it hadn’t been for variable quota none of that craziness would have happened.Now, run!”
When I look around, I’m one of only a few girls still left in the Grove. I rush out to the end of the row, pushing over one, then two chairs trying to get to Ellie. But when I make it to the place where we both agreed to meet, she’s not there. I’m too late.
So I run. Run like a track star, out of the Grove, past the Union, and down Sorority Row toward the Alpha Delt House. My adrenaline is roaring—I’ve never felt anything like it. Hundreds of boys are lined up on both sides of the street watching, and when I pass I look several of them in the eye with pride. Like I’m this new person, an adult peacock, well, actually a peahen, who has suddenly broken out of a shame shell that had bound and crippled her fan feathers far too long. When I pass the Tri Delt House I look for Ellie, but it’s no use. Their crowd is enormous, spilling into the street.
I can see the Alpha Delt House in the distance so I race faster, rememberingmy cross-country days when I could see the finish line. When I finally make it to the curb, completely out of breath, the members are dressed in adorable costumes, lined up and holding hands across the front walkway—underneath a balloon arch—to form a human tunnel.More than likely, I’m the last one here,I think, so I take my place in line behind other new members. When it’s my turn, I duck and run. Girls are cheering as I move through, patting me on the shoulder. I am free. I am alive. I am home!
At the end of the tunnel Sarah is waiting for me. She must have run as fast as I did to get here. She pulls me aside and slips a white Alpha Delta Beta jersey over my head, then hands me a much-needed bottle of water. After wrapping a ribbon name tag necklace around my neck, she squeezes the life out of me, then the two of us drain our water bottles.
After swallowing the last sip, I look around the yard. “This day seems surreal, Sarah. When will it all sink in?”
“Maybe by the time you graduate,” she says, flicking her eyebrows.
