Declan waved, and Soraya smiled before leading the boys back out of the store onto the sidewalk. “Burritos?” she asked, gesturing toward the little walk-up window down the street.
“Sure,” Levi said.
She started walking, and they followed. “I’m going to dinner with Declan this weekend.”
They both stopped right where they were on the sidewalk, their expressions filled with shock and horror.
“Well. Better that you know. I just don’t want to go back to not talking. I don’t want to do secrets.”
“But ...” Levi looked pained. “You’re actually dating?”
“I guess so.” She started walking again. “I’m doing my best to not be a liar or a hypocrite.” Best practice would be to not talk smack about their dad, but she also wasn’t going to take on fault for the sake of being the bigger person.
The martyrish wife. No. She was done with that.
He’d put their kids in terrible danger. He’d lied to everyone. Like Levi said, he’d madethemget purity rings, for God’s sake.
“You really need to date?” Jaden asked.
“No. I don’t need to. But I’m not just your mom, you know. I’m a whole person, and I want to be happy and meet someone. I want romance and to have someone with me.”
“But not Dad,” Jaden confirmed.
“No.” She looked at him. “Do you blame me?”
“No,” Levi mumbled.
“No.” Jaden seemed surprised at his own answer.
“Good. Then I’ll keep you posted.” She put her arm around Jaden, and Levi dodged her, smiling just slightly, but it felt teenage and normal, and not like he hated her.
She could breathe.
She felt like she was coming out of it. Felt like she was coming into the light, after walking in the darkness for way too long.
Chapter Thirty-One
Nora
I release what holds me back,
I release what no longer fits,
I honor the ending of the cycle,
I am at peace,
I am free.
—A spell for moving on
Nora needed to deal with Sam. The night around the bonfire had given her clarity. It had made her feel new. It had given her a much clearer view of herself, not just as she had been, but how she wanted to be.
She spent the day working on the mural and came to a very important conclusion.
Before she did anything else, she needed to talk to Ben. She needed to rip that Band-Aid off, because it was a wound she was protecting. Because if she had gone to Sam first, it would have felt wrong. Like she had decided to beta test how things were going with him before she pulled the plug on her marriage. She didn’t want to put Sam in that position. She didn’t want to put herself in that position.
So she had to do it. Maybe it was the right move. Because she needed to practice. Being honest. Being vulnerable.
