She knew better now.
So she would do better.
She would help them do better.
A prayer, a promise, and a spell all rolled into one.
An ambulance drove onto the street, and she moved to David on instinct. “Come on, you need them to look at this.” She walked him over to the paramedics and then moved back to the boys. “Do you want to spend the night with me tonight?”
“What about Dad?” Jaden asked.
“He might have to go to the hospital.” She thought about Ben and Jonathan. Would all their husbands be in the hospital tonight? She felt sick.
“Yeah. I want to stay with you.” Jaden’s shoulders shook. “All our stuff is gone.”
It was. But not the most precious possessions, because they’d been at the other house, and she’d taken them with her. “I have our pictures,”she said. “I have your birth certificates and your passports. I have your stuffed animals.”
“You do?” Levi asked.
“Yes. I had to bring what was most important to me.”
“But you left us,” Levi said.
“I left Dad. I’m sorry that it didn’t make sense to you.”
“I know that he ...” Levi looked down. “I’m sorry I acted like I did. I didn’t believe he did anything really bad because he said he didn’t. He said you were ...”
“I know what he said.” Or at least she knew a variation of it. She was doing her own thing. Walking away from what they knew. From the faith. Walking away from her marriage was that terrible. “It doesn’t matter now.”
The female police officer approached them. “I’m sorry, I know the timing is bad, but I need to get some witness statements from the boys while everything is fresh in their memory.”
“Oh . . .”
“It won’t take very long.” The woman gathered the boys to her as she started to ask them questions.
Nora came running up a moment later, and so did Daisy, wearing a bathrobe and slippers. “Soraya, are you okay?” Daisy’s eyes were wide with fear.
“No,” Soraya said. “No, I’m not okay. I can’t ... I can’t do any of this anymore. I need to leave the apothecary. I need ... I have to stop this.”
Guilt gnawed at her. Guilt and rage and so many other emotions.
But guilt was her friend. Guilt was the one she knew best.
Daisy grabbed hold of Soraya’s shoulder. “Soraya, you don’t want to leave the apothecary. We ... we’re doing good there. You’re doing good. And Aggie ...”
“I’ll figure it out.” Fear and regret were tearing Soraya apart, her whole body aching, shaking like she’d just been chased by a lion. “My kids could have died. Maybe you can believe we didn’t do this with ourspells, but I can’t escape the feeling that it’s a punishment for meddling with what we shouldn’t have. I almost let darkness consume me, and look what happened.”
“Soraya ...” Nora tried to walk after her.
“I’m taking my boys home. Back to my apartment, and I’m not ... I can’t do this.”
Her car that she’d left for David was in the driveway, and she still had her set of keys in her purse. David was in the ambulance, and she went to check in on him one last time.
“We’ll take him and make sure there isn’t any other trauma. Would anyone like to come with him?”
“No.” Soraya didn’t listen as David protested her simple answer. She went back to the boys in the car and started the engine. She had her kids back.
But she’d almost lost them. Nothing was worth that. Nothing.
