The suit he wore was topnotch, his bowler hat set at a jaunty angle on his head. He’d pulled back his brown hair and tethered it with a piece of leather, and he sported sideburns but no beardas was popular among many gentlemen. I rather enjoyed seeing his jawline.
“That is a heartening sentiment.” I adjusted my lace gloves and gathered my nerves for the next question I wished to put to him. It had been painful to speak to him at first, but the more we conversed, the easier it became. “Then it is me you find offensive?”
“You are the daughter of an earl and a virgin. I don’t despoil virgins or fornicate in front of them,” he said with a grim smile.
“I’m the sixth child. All of my siblings are wed, and I’m the last one. At twenty-five, I’m on the shelf. I have no marriage prospects, nor do I foresee any in the future.” My siblings were blessed with amiability and conversed in tones above a whisper. I was woefully deficient in navigating society, and my social skills were lacking. It was a source of frustration for my parents and for me. I wasn’t sure why I was different; I just was.
“You are from a prominent family. You could use your considerable influence to publish your book with a reputable vendor.” The duke plucked a leaf from a low-hanging branch. He twirled it in his gloved fingers and brought it to his nose, inhaling. He was in tune with the nature surrounding us. It was refreshing to see a man of his station aware of others and not focused on his self-interests.
“I’m not interested in using my family connections for my success. It is a matter of pride to me.” I needed him to see my point of view. As a woman, my worth was determined by my marital status. I never had a serious suitor, despite my modest dowry. Thus, I had to depend on myself for my accomplishments. “Please understand,” I said, barely above a whisper.
“I understand. We’re all like this leaf, one of many on the branch. On the surface, we look the same. If you look carefully, you can see the individuality that defines it.” He held the leaf upto the sky and traced a fingertip along the middle. I could see tiny veins in the thin membrane. “That is how I feel about my art. It’s an extension of me, the man, not my title.”
“You’re a very unusual gentleman. Do you think your friend would participate for one night?” The flash of heat returned, along with a tingling in the secret place between my thighs. My brashness was alarming and liberating in the same instant. All night, I dreamed of the duke and his model. With each flashback, my core throbbed with unfulfilled need. I had no understanding of how to quench the need. It was very frustrating. My governess had forbidden me to touch myself in that area. Why I had no idea, but I never broke the rules.
The duke lowered the leaf and allowed it to flutter to the ground. A hummingbird shot out from between the trees, its green wings flapping quicker than the eye could see. “I believe I already said no.”
I wanted to protest but snapped my jaw shut. If I wanted to persuade him, I would have to be bolder. Except aggressiveness wasn’t in my nature. I could appeal to his better side. “From one artist to another, I beg you reconsider. All I’m asking for is a single night.” The memories would last me a lifetime. It was a daring proposition at best. “Please.”
“There are many ways to learn such things. Come to my house tomorrow, and I’ll show you my special library.” The duke steered me back the way we’d come, his manner turning brisk. His demeanor heralded the end of our discussion. I swallowed a rush of disappointment. I had tried my best and failed.
“Why don’t you simply lend them to me?” I was an avid reader as well as a writer. To have new books at my disposal made my fingers tingle with eagerness.
Lord Kendrick shook his head, a grim twist to his lips. His expression was grave. “The descriptions in those books will pale compared to what you saw, Lady Lillian. If anyone found them,you could be in more trouble than you ever dreamed of. The contents are against the law. Do you understand?”
I could either argue further or agree with his suggestion. It was a give and take. I had taken advantage of the situation. I suppose that was how blackmail worked, but I didn’t feel good about it. “How will I enter? It isn’t acceptable for a single lady to visit a bachelor’s residence.”
Lord Kendrick walked me back across the street to my house, his steps brisk and sure. He’d been very generous with his time, and I appreciated his patience, but I wasn’t ready for our discussion to end.
“I believe there is a common gate.” Despite the scandalous turn of our tête-à-tête, every moment spent in his company lessened my anxiety. He was indeed an original. Most gentlemen I met dismissed me out of hand and rarely tried to engage me in a discussion. He’d taken the time to listen, albeit under the yolk of potential blackmail.
The duke halted on the walkway. “I’ll have my man, Colt, meet you tomorrow at the time of your choice.”
“This is very kind of you. What should I tell my mother?” What he was proposing was a godsend. He was offering me a golden opportunity to find multiple examples of debauchery to use as a template for my own scenes. I swallowed my dismay. The findings wouldn’t be in my own words but from the observation of others.
Lord Kendrick cocked one brow; his head tilted in confusion. “Tell her whatever will allow you to slip away.”
“I mean what I should say about today’s outing. There will be questions.” My mother would think he was courting me, which couldn’t be farther from the truth.
Lips pressed together; he considered my question for a long moment. “You may tell her I found your letter in my garden and thought to return it to you.”
“No, that won’t do. She disapproves of my writing. Your mother speaks highly of your pottery. Perhaps I could commission a vase from you for my mother?” It would drain my allowance, but it would be worth it.
Admiration brightened his eyes. “Yes, that is a bang-up plan. Send a note around, and Colt will take care of everything. Good day, Lady Lillian.” He tipped his hat and, with a brief nod of goodbye, turned on his heel and left.
I watched him go, unable to stop staring like a silly ninny. Once I went inside, I would have to field a host of questions. It would well be worth it. I would have a better chance of convincing him if I could spend more time in his company. Granted, I could blackmail him for real. That didn’t sit well with me. To force the issue with him wasn’t the answer. Seduction was.
The goosebumps were back, but this time they held a different meaning. I had no clue how to seduce him. It would be amusing if it wasn’t so vexing. The idea had taken root. It might take time, but I would see it through to the end. Giving up was not an option if I ever hoped to live out my dreams.
