“Okay…” Her brows drew together. “So, you’re saying…what?”
“I hallucinated that night. I was sure it was real, but I don’t think it was now—not based on what the responding officer said. What you said. I…I didn’t know. Not until my mother and my teammates sat me down in an intervention earlier this week.”
Vivian’s eyes never left my face. “You had a hallucination after those men ran off, before the police and I got to you.”
“I think so. Yes.”
“Why do you think that, Lennon? Why tell me this now?” Her voice cracked. She pressed her lips together, but I caught the faint tremor in her jaw.
“I…” I moved around her, and Vivian turned with me. I crossed the living room, with its pretty hardwood floors and the ornate table lamps with broad shades my mother loved so much. I settled on the couch, which was the farthest piece of furniture; there were two armchairs closer to the door. I wanted Vivian to know she could leave, that I wouldn’t force her to stay. I also really needed to sit down because my knees quaked.
I told her in as much detail as possible what I remembered from that night. As I talked, she slipped into the chair closest to me. Much as I wanted to take comfort in that, I forced myself not to. Vivian was here; she was listening. That was more than I had any right to hope for.
She sat in silence. Then she leaned closer and gripped my wrist. “Tell me again, please.”
I did.
When she let go of my wrist and leaned back against her cushion, I mourned the loss of that contact. Jeez, I was even more of a sap than I’d known—and I was well acquainted with my emotions. I’d had to be with two younger sisters and a single mom.
“You thought he threatened me. Threatened to ra?—”
“Yes.” I didn’t want to hear her say the word. “Then kill you. I was sure he’d said that.”
“That’s why you sent me away…”
“Yes.”
Her lashes fluttered as she shook her head. “I thought you couldn’t stand to be near me.” She met my gaze, hers haunted. “I thought the trauma of the event was too much, and you?—”
I rose from the couch and dropped to my knees at her feet. “No, Vivi. No. It wasn’t you. I just… I had to protect you, had to make sure you were safe. It was my penance for walking down that street, thinking I could handle anything…” Tentatively, I took her hands in mine. They were chilled, so I curled my fingers around hers. “I was too cocky.”
Vivian gave my fingers a gentle squeeze. “I need to think this through. I just… I don’t know what to do, Lennon. I started piecing my life back together without you in it, and it really, really hurts.” She sucked her lower lip into her mouth. “I can’t go through that again. More importantly, I won’t.”
“I understand.”
“I don’t think you do. Would you stand up, please? I need to…”
I jumped to my feet, and Vivian rose. She began to pace, shaking out her hands. “You decided what was best for me—for me—and didn’t even let me have a say in that decision.”
“I…” I hadn’t ever thought of it like that. I swallowed hard. “I’m so sorry. It just seemed like the only option.”
“But it wasn’t, was it? If I’d known about the threats he made, I could have mentioned it to the police. You could have mentioned it to the police. We could have come up with another solution that was safe even if it had been true. Instead…” She whipped around, her arms falling to her side. “I cried my eyes out for months,” she rasped.
“Vivi, I’m so sor?—”
“Don’t. Don’t apologize again. It changes nothing.”
“But…”
“I need to think.” She rubbed her forehead right above her creased brows. “I’ll get a hotel for the night. I just need some time.”
“There’s no need for that,” my mother said as she swept into the room. She wore a casual cotton lounge set in soft lilac and some wedge sandals. Her toenails coordinated with her outfit, and her glasses nestled into her dark, chin-length bob.
She kissed my cheek and wiped away her lipstick. Then, she went over and wrapped Vivi in a hug. “I’m so glad you’re here, my darling. Let me get you settled in your room.”
“Room? Vivi’s staying here?” I looked back and forth between them.
Lola took a deep steadying breath and turned to me. “Yes. I hired Vivian to come stay with me. She’s going to help me manage my cancer treatments."
