Tears formed, but I refused to let them fall. His tortured expression kept me rooted to the spot, somehow unable to scramble away, to put the distance I needed between us.Put on your clothes. Leave.
He came toward me and touched my hair, his big hand tentative. He tucked the strand back, fingering the ends. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that photo was there.” He rubbed his hand over his cheek, darkened by the start of a five-o’clock shadow. He pulled me closer and lifted the covers on the bed, seeming to know I needed some shield for this conversation.
“Why?” I asked. I dropped the box of condoms—my eyes widened at the size, magnums—and scrambled underneath the sheet, tugging it up to my chest. I clenched the edge, my knuckles popping with the strain.
His expression turned even more mournful, but he didn’t object. “My mother set it on my nightstand the only time she’s visited. She doesn’t believe in divorce. She thinks Shannon and I are perfect together. I tossed it in the drawer because I didn’t want it out.” His expression hardened.
We sat in silence.
“Um, this is awkward. I mean, the mood tanked, but we’re still naked…” I said.
He laughed, and then so did I. Some of the tension eased. Finally, he sobered and turned toward me. He cupped my cheeks as he studied me, looking deep into my soul. “I’m sorry. I’d never hurt you, Keelie. Please, please, believe that.”
I took my time searching his eyes. They were filled with my pain. “Okay.”
He blew out a breath. “Want some dinner?”
“Um…” I looked down at his lap. Disappointment raced through me when I noted he was no longer hard. Not that I could have sex with him right now. I didn’t trust him. I didn’t trust anyone.
Hell, the woman I’d considered my best friend had used me. I lifted my knees and rested my cheek against them as I wrapped my arms around my shins. Confusion buffeted me.
Cormac kissed the top of my head before he rose from the bed and stretched. I enjoyed the play of muscles as they rippled over his sublime back. I pressed my legs together as a faint pulse throbbed in my core.Not the time.
Anger and jealousy whipped through me. Was what he’d told me true? Did he still have feelings for his ex? He’d said he didn’t. My confusion grew into a storm, swirling in my chest. I didn’t know what to do—how to fix this.
He turned toward me, his expression both amused and bleak. “Well, that didn’t go according to plan. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to spend time with you.”
“Maybe I should go…”
He nodded. “If you want to, I understand. But I don’t want you to leave.” He settled next to me on the edge of the bed once more, close enough to touch, but he didn’t try.
I licked my lips. “I don’t know what to do, what to think…”
“Hey, this is new for me, too, Keelie. I’m trying. Putting myself out there after Shannon shattered me? It’s fucking hard.” His Adam’s apple dipped, and his jaw clenched. “I never expected to meet someone again. Someone I could share my life with.”
I tilted my head. “Are you saying you’re thinking long-term between us?”
A smile flitted across his mouth. “Yeah. That’s what I’m saying.” His brows puckered. “I wasn’t looking for anything, but then you happened.” His expression softened and caring shone from his eyes. “I don’t want to fight against us. I want to fight for us. For a future.”
“I… It’s fast…” I whispered.
“It is, but it isn’t, really. You meeting the team solidified it for me. That’s why I more than happy to take you by your place to pick up your cat and whatever you need—clothes, toiletries. I want you here. I’mhappierwith you here.”
My heart fluttered and dipped, my confusion giving way to a burgeoning joy. But I tempered it with the ruthlessness I’d learned as a young girl.Men say things. They don’t always mean them.
Except…except Cormac seemed to.
He dropped his head forward, lacing his fingers behind his neck. “I don’t like to talk feelings.”
I smirked. “Few men do.”
“Stereotype much?”
I laughed. “Am I wrong?”
He grinned as he shook his head. My heart rate evened out. Teasing I could manage. The heavy emotions… He wasn’t the only one twisting in the wind, unable to find his footing.
“Nah. Most dudes I know don’t like deep, emotional discussions, especially not with a beautiful woman sitting naked in their bed.” He winked. “Can’t believe my mother cock blocked me,” he muttered. He lifted his head, eyes wide with worry. “I just mean there’s no way we’d sex it up tonight.”
