The worst kind of fool. The kind who failed to learn a valuable and painful lesson.
“Are you listening, Ren?”
I blinked, pulled sharply back into the present. Mattie stood in front of me, hands on his hips, his green eyes suspicious. “Sorry,” I said with a chuckle. “I must’ve been daydreaming.”
He giggled, the sound an instant balm to the pain of the past.
“It happens even to grown-ups.”
“What were you daydreaming about?” he asked, curiosity written all over his face.
I hesitated for only a moment. “I was thinking about how much you remind me of your dad. He was always so curious about every little thing, and he asked lots of questions.”
His eyes widened. “Really?”
I nodded. “Yep.” It wasn’t just those green eyes either, though they were identical. “You don’t see it?”
Mattie shook his head, looking genuinely stunned. “He’s so big and awesome.”
“You’re awesome too,” I assured him. “The big part comes with age. Your dad was a little boy once.”
That made him laugh, loud and unselfconscious, and something in my chest softened in response.
We finished lessons by early afternoon. I uploaded everything through the VPN Enzo’s security team had set up to ensure Mattie didn’t fall behind during his time away. The system was efficient and encrypted, and given the threat he’d spoken about, it was exactly the right amount of caution. It was odd, operating each day with that level of protection surrounding us, humming quietly and effectively in the background.
When it was time for play, Mattie bounced on his toes. “Can we do something outside?” he asked, wearing the same excited grin every day.
I scanned the backyard outside the window, taking in the tall trees that provided excellent cover and the seemingly endless carpet of green. I couldn’t see them, but I knew there were cameras all over the property, invisible to the naked eye but omnipresent. I tapped my chin as if I had to think about it even though I had a plan. “I have an idea, but I’m not sure you’re up for it.”
“What is it?” he asked, his question too loud.
“Have you ever done a scavenger hunt?”
His eyes sparkled with excitement, but he shook his head. “What’s that?”
I explained it simply. “We’ll write up clues for one another to help us find each object,” I said, pulling out two bags filled with toys, candies, and school supplies. “Write a clue and hide something.”
He laughed when I gave him an example. “This is gonna be fun!”
“I hope so,” I laughed. “Don’t go too far, though, okay?”
“Yep. Got it!” He ran to the middle of the backyard with his bag, dropping down on the grass with his legs crossed, tongue stuck out as he carefully wrote out his clues.
I smiled to myself as I hid the small treasures around the backyard, including several plastic, wooden, and inflatable dinosaurs. I wrote clues that would require him to think critically, count steps, and observe the world around him.
We exchanged clues and spent the next hour traipsing around the property to uncover treasures. At some point, I realized that it was too quiet for an excited little boy who radiated noise and laughter. “Mattie?” I called out, scanning the area in all directions. He wasn’t there.
I retraced the path of my clues, my heart banging around too fast, until I spotted him under the giant oak tree, curled up and sleeping peacefully.
I stood there for a long moment and watched his chest rise and fall, the afternoon light dappling his hair. Careful not to wake him, I crouched and brushed a leaf from his hair.
That was when I knew with startling clarity that I was already in too deep, and it had nothing to do with Enzo. Oh no, it was the smaller DeRossi who’d pulled me in and wrapped me around his finger.
Lifting him carefully, I let his small weight settle against me as I carried him back inside.
Enzo stood there at the top of the steps, his expression going from alert to soft in the blink of an eye. He took in the sight of Mattie in my arms, and his expression shifted to something I couldn’t quite figure out, which served as a perfect and much-needed reminder that I didn’t know him anymore. He looked like my Enzo, but he wasn’t.
“He wore himself out,” I whispered, stepping around him without touching him.
