Quinn’s hair dripped onto the carpet. His skin prickled from the cold, but he managed to suppress his shivers. Soot was still streaked on him, which told me he’d remained outside for some time after the execution.
Come to think of it, I hadn’t seen him move at all since they lit the fire.
“They burned her alive,” he said. “I let it happen. I should have taken her to Hadria.”
But he hadn’t.
Quinn stepped back. His voice lowered. “I grew up seeing Florence around Pontarena. Beyond the occasional greeting, her and I never spoke; the Maitres usually kept to their own. But that trick with the shadows? I feel like I have no idea who she was, all this time.”
Neither did I. So many questions I’d never thought to ask, and now I never could.
“Do you truly believe she put a curse on Gallae?” he asked, turning at last to look at me.
I shrugged, more because I didn’t want to believe it. To exact revenge upon one person was one matter, but an entire nation? What was her angle?
“There isn’t a night I don’t think of you begging me to take you away from here,” Quinn said. “I was a coward. I should have. Now you’re the queen, one who’s been trained in that very same magic, and you’ll make hard choices until there’s nothing soft left behind.”
“I’m not the person I was when I came here,”I agreed.“But as Queen of Antier, maybe I can change things. Help people. I have the commoner’s background, so I see what others miss.”
“You’ll turn out like the rest of us. Cold, calculating, afraid…” He trailed off, meeting my eyes. I scowled back at him. “No. I won’t watch that happen to you.”
I lifted my hands, but he closed the distance and grabbed my wrists, pulling them down between us.
“Run away with me.”
My glare deepened. I tried to pull away, but his grip was iron.
“I’ll arrange everything. Passage to Hadria, gold, new names. We’ll take Juliana and disappear. I’m leaving Gallae, and I want you with me. If you can look me in the eyes and tell me you want to be here,” Quinn paused. “Then I’ll drop the issue at once.”
I bit my tongue and stopped fighting.
Of course it was a risk to stay here, but frankly, I couldn’t remember a time in my life when I felt safe. In the woods, I was raised to fear snapping twigs and mysterious interlopers. Now I had power, and once I learned to wield it, I could fight back, not only for myself, but for anyone who ever felt that same helplessness…but I would never know true freedom.
“You can’t, can you?” he whispered, lowering his head to mine.
His hold on me loosened, then he let go.
I didn’t dare move. I let his breath fan over my neck, memorizing how this felt. So wrong, but somehow right enough that I considered his offer.
I let myself dream: a little house on the beach, Juliana covered in foreign sand, eating strange food and calling QuinnFather.I’d wake every morning to his arm draped around me, hair tangled with mine. Another child; I’d give him a small army if he wanted, if only to watch the way he loved them, just like how he loved little Juliana.
And all the while, the people of Gallae would starve and fall ill and die. Quinn traded Florence’s life for me. Would he willingly trade millions of others? Would he risk a war with Nicolas—
Oh, Nicolas. He’d been far from my thoughts, equally complicit in getting Florence killed as the rest of us. But now he was here, his spirit wedged between us.
He’d hunt us to the ends of the world.
I wasn’t sure if Quinn understood that. His heart would shatter, and when he inevitably caught up to us, the poor man couldn’t even hate me for it.
And even if I were to solely follow my heart’s selfish desires, I couldn’t. Because somewhere down the line, I’d started to care for Nicolas, and no matter how matters of the Crown tried to tear us apart, the wounds only seemed to calcify our bond.
Maybe I was a fool to love the king, whose heart only yearned for mine because of magical interference. But my feelings were my own;Iwas not enchanted.
“Quinn,”I signed.“I can’t.”
His hands framed my face, thumbs grazing over my cheekbones. He was quiet for a while, holding me as he deliberated. His eyes shut.
“Lie to me, then. Tell me you will, even if you won’t.” He took his hands away but stayed close. “Lie and say you’ll run away with me. Just this once, have the mercy to let me believe in a future where you’re mine. Play me for a fool one last time. Show me that we were real.”
