“Lana,” he muttered, knocking the side of his head to mine. I shook my head fervently, my eyes fixed on the Lord of Night’s shroud. “I don’t want to die yet… So, I won’t. We’ll get back, find a healer. I’m going to live for a long time.”
My heart fluttered with dread for the very real possibility that he might be deluding himself, that the healer might not save himorMarcy.
“There are a lot of things I need to do. That I want to do. When I was fighting thatthing…all I could think about was how I never got to tell you how beautiful you are.”
Heat bloomed in my cheeks. So long as I held him, he’d spill his heart…but I couldn’t let go.
“I’ll live to see tomorrow. To tell you more, little by little.” He smiled, thumb tracing the back of my hand. “I’m sorry I was cold to you. I didn’t know how to conduct myself around you anymore, not after what transpired in the maze. But I’ve decided I can feel the way I do and let myself be tortured because I think you’re worth it. Not because you’re beautiful—though you are, maddeningly so—but because I know you. I know exactly what you are.”
Those shadows surged around him, wrapping about his neck like a serpent, but he kept on walking, a satisfied look settled on his face.
It wasn’t a terrible secret. There was nothing he’d regret, come morning.
And hewouldsee morning.
Chapter 40
The past fewdays left me raw. I took a walk, seeking distance from Nicolas’ watchful eyes as I wandered past picnic blankets and clusters of guardsmen. Only a day’s ride from the unpleasantness at Thornmarsh had taken us to Sunhill, a pleasant and sunny city that might have been immune to the harsh realities gripping the rest of Gallae. Now we rested in a glen, traveling the road west to Molehill.
That night in Thornmarsh felt like a lifetime ago, though only four days had passed since I stumbled through the baron’s narrow door, Quinn’s blood soaking through my ruined clothes as I half-carried him inside. Marcy swayed on Asli’s shoulder, a redundant ear dangling from where it should have been, yet by some miracle she remained conscious.
Nicolas was pacing by the fire when we stumbled in, a cup of mead halfway to his lips. He saw me, covered in marsh filth and blood, Quinn barely conscious against my shoulder, and the color drained so quickly from his face that I thought he’d faint. The common room erupted into chaos as people scattered to help.
“Alana!” He crossed the room, hands hovering over me in careful assessment before settling on my stomach. “Gods, what happened to you? We searched for hours. Are you hurt?”
I shook my head, but I couldn’t sign while I supported Quinn. Even if I had signed, Nicolas was too busy cataloguing me for injury to watch my hands.
“Cursed men,” Quinn managed through his exhaustion. “She’s unharmed. We got there in time.”
Nicolas’ gaze fell to Quinn’s mangled arm. He took hold of his face. “Look at me. Quinn?”
Quinn’s eyes finally found his. He smiled weakly, lulling his head to his shoulder.
“You’re a damned fool,” Nicolas scowled.
They stared at one another in wordless conversation. Then Nicolas barked his orders at the wise woman just as she entered the main room, overseeing every stitch in Quinn’s arm, holding him down when that tonic of wolfsbane made him thrash.
The wise woman bounced between both injured parties, treating their wounds before the sun could rise, but it was a constant effort of medicinal application and suturing.
I could only take so much agony. I had to leave, to return to our guestroom and take a bath. Even then, there was no escaping the sounds of Quinn and Marcy’s combined suffering, nor the argument between Nicolas and Adelaide that started up somewhere near the door to my guest chamber.
“Absolutely not!”the former queen shouted.
“Someone tried to murder my wife!”Nicolas’ voice broke in the middle of his sentence.“You spoke to me of a great desire to keep this baby safe. How isthisprotecting the child?!”
“Insolent boy! I will brook no argument. The tour continues as planned.”
Then her footsteps receded down the hall, and I had to wonder what more she’d said to Nicolas that I hadn’t been privy to.
There was no way in hell I was sleeping that night, not while my blood ran hot, so I made use of my time. When the night was quiet at last and the sun was only a thought on the horizon, Nicolas found me in the guestroom, huddled near the hearth as I finished extracting the essence of the Silverwood Lotus. I poured my decoction into a number of round glass bottles the baroness had provided for me, corking them off.
“What are you doing?” he asked, his voice startling the life out of me. I took a moment to recuperate, then faced him.
“A cure for Lady Navarro. Quinn told me about her condition.”
Exhaustion was catching up to me, and I barely had the capacity for conversation. But Nicolas was still, folding his arms over his chest. “You can cure her?”
“Maybe. The lotus I found is known for its purging benefits. It binds to heavy metals. Worst case scenario, I’ve made a shittydrink, but it’s possible I’ve come up with something that may help a number of women, including her.”
