From up here, you could see the sea at the end of the street one way and the sharply rising escarpment at the other. Lucy loved it. Her work was two doors down, and her family were around the corner; everything she knew lay in between. She felt safe here.
‘You’ve got a nice place,’ he said.
She laughed. ‘You’re about the only member of my family who thinks so.’
He grunted thoughtfully before turning to her. ‘It’s like a retreat. One storey up, above it all. A place to escape.’
Lucy raked her fingers through her hair. She knew Dan didn’t talk like this to anyone else, especially their mother. She suspected she was the only one he let see behind the armour — probably because she was the least sympathetic and the most likely to be rude to him or laugh at him. Sometimes it was easier to open up to someone who wouldn’t drown you in sympathy. Even so, despite direct questions, he hadn’t really opened up since coming home.
She checked the clock. A few minutes late wouldn’t hurt.
‘And why, may I ask, do you need to retreat from the world?’
He didn’t answer. She wasn’t giving up. She didn’t know when she’d get another opening.
‘What happened, Dan?’
He turned his head. ‘About what?’
‘You. You left for the US confident, cocky, with the world at your feet. And you stayed like that for years. But now? You’re back, you look shell-shocked half the time, and you don’t seem in any hurry to return to your home and your job.’
He didn’t face her, just kept staring out to sea. ‘I’m not going back.’
‘You’re…?’
‘Not going back,’ he repeated. A gust of wind rattled the awning of the shop below, and he turned away from the railing. ‘Not yet, anyway.’ He rocked back on his heels as he looked around the apartment. ‘Thought I might hang around here for a few months and confuse my family.’
‘What about work?’
‘I quit.’
‘You quit your job in Washington? How come? I thought you loved being a lobbyist.’
‘I did. But now…’ He came back inside and closed the balcony doors firmly. ‘I don’t. So I left. Is that sufficient for you to pass on to the others?’
‘Are you kidding? No! I need more detail.’
He sighed, mouth tightening. She knew she was pushing it. ‘I couldn’t stand the double-dealing — the subterfuge, the secrets… the lies.’
‘Ha! And that’s just your personal life!’ Lucy waited for Dan to laugh with her. He didn’t.
Instead, he turned to her. ‘And that is definitely all you’re getting.’ He took a long swallow of wine. ‘Don’t worry, Luce. Everything’s fine.’
She grimaced.
‘Why don’t you believe me?’ he asked.
‘Because you’ve got a weird look about you. It’s like you’re going through the motions. Someone speaks, you answer, but you’re not really there.’
He huffed and closed his eyes briefly. The tiny flinch told her she’d hit the mark.
‘Are you depressed or something?’
His stillness answered more truthfully than words would have.
She reached out and put a hand on his arm. He spun around.
‘What happened, Dan?’
