“You’re not her savior.” She takes a sip as if letting that sink into my skull. “You can’t just help her out in a big way and expect her to fall at your feet head over heels in love with you again.”
“No, you’re right.” My throat gets rough. That’s what landed me in trouble with other women, letting my money buy their affection. I run a hand through my hair. I stare at the screen, my chest twisting with anger, guilt, protectiveness, all forming together into some new feeling unnamed by anyone, ever.
“Why do I care this much?” I force myself to say it. “Renae… tell me I’m insane.”
Renae lifts a brow. “Oh, certifiably.”
“Thanks.”
“But you’re also human, and somewhere in that enormous chest of yours, you have a big heart,” she adds. “The question is, what do you want to do? You could either walk away or…?”
I close my eyes and weigh the options. My track record with love is garbage, though. Zero for two. Worse at the casual stuff.
“What makes me think I’ll win this time?” My laugh is humorless. “What should I do? Chase Stella Branch like I’m twenty-two again, thinking I can get a different outcome? I’ve done love. It didn’t work.”
Renae watches me as if she’s assessing a target. “So you’re going to do nothing.”
I swallow. “I should leave her alone.”
“But… you won’t.”
In my mind, I see Aiden and the way he fell and got back up without whining. The way he looked at me like I was a hero just for showing him how to glide on a silver edge for an hour. Does that mean Jerrod doesn’t spend much time with him? Does Jerrod even know what a cool boy he has?
I skim through more of the information Renae’s sources collected, and I try not to think too hard about how this information was obtained. They found Stella has legal custody except for holidays and a visit once per month. Jerrod still lives back east. It’s unlikely he poses any threat if I get close to them.
Why can’t I let Stella go? If I could haveneverrun into her again, my life would have continued on the same. But now, having seen her, our past feels like unfinished business, pulling me in deeper.
“I have to do this.”
“Because of her,” Renae says.
“And the son,” I correct automatically, then pause and admit the truth. “Because of both.”
Renae takes a slow sip from her can, then her expression turns sharp and satisfied. After a few clicks on her keyboard, she announces, “Okay, sir. Then I’m sending you the rental agreement for the Boulder ice rink, the details for your new hockey classes, and a potential schedule which I’ve cross-referenced with your entire calendar. If you sign off on it all, then I’ll send the information letter to all the parents, including, and most importantly, to Stella.”
“Thanks. You’re the greatest, Renae, you know that?” I make a mental note to send her a dozen cases of Mountain Dew tomorrow.
“I’m glad you see what’s fucking obvious, sir.”
I chuckle, and we hang up. I get the things Renae sends, and I review everything one more time and sign off on it. Assuming Stella enrolls Aiden in the class, by next week I’ll see them again. I can’t wait. For added insurance, I text Renae to set up an opportunity for me to speak at Aiden’s school next week, if they’ll have me. That should get him riled to bug Stella enough so that she’ll sign him up in case she hesitates.
Satisfied, I return to the game room with a huge smile on my face. The guys are demolishing pizzas.
“What’s going on now?” Sean observes.
“I have news,” I announce over the movie playing on TV and rub my hands together. “The foundation is expanding. We’re going to Boulder next week, boys. I’ll need your help to teach the participants how to play hockey. Think of the difference you can make in those kids’ lives by doing this.”
Their support will come in handy as I fight hard to see if Stella and I get a second chance.
“Are we really doing this for the kids… or for your woman?” Tyler asks, eyebrow raised.
“For the kids, of course,” I correct him. But my smile turns sly. “But yeah. Something like that.”
CHAPTER 6
STAYING UPRIGHT
STELLA
