Gorgeous fucking Murderpunk, sitting in the moonlight, surrounded by gravestones.He looked nothing like human, he never did.But he lookedright.Right for the setting.Right for Antonio, who would’ve stepped forward to pull the sluagh into his arms, if the guy hadn’t started talking.
“Can’t say that I have, no,” Declan said, looking at … something.
Antonio’s eyes didn’t want to see it.But as he stood on the other side of the wall, bond humming, the not-thing became clearer.A woman in old fashioned clothes, sitting across from Declan.
She glowed faintly, and Antonio could see the gravestones through her.A ghost.Because offuckingcourse.
Right, so, either he stood by the wall, leering at his boyfriend or he wandered in and interrupted Declan making nice with Casper.Antonio wavered, shifting in place, fingers drumming against the stone.This would be a great moment to conveniently break a twig.
Well, he and Declanwerebonded.Antonio reached for it, the tangle whereIbecamewe.From there, well, hetriedto send a pulse of feeling between them.
Just, a‘hey, I’m standing here watching you and totally not in a creepy way.’
“…they pass through like the waters,” the ghost’s voice became clear as Antonio focused on the bond.“The gentleman, he says– Are you still listening?”
“Yes, of course,” Declan answered, but then he turned, glancing over his shoulder toward Antonio.“My apologies, ma’am, I believe my companion is here.”
Declan smiled at him, and any idea Antonio might have had of hanging out by the wall until the sluagh was done playing medium was immediately forgotten.That was the thing about the bond.There was no doubt in it.Plenty of confusion, but no doubt.Declan was happy to see him.Antonioknewhe was.
“You came,” Declan said, getting to his feet and heading over.
“Can he see me?”the ghost asked, standing–or floating, hell if Antonio knew–as well.“I bet he can.Do you like jokes, handsome?”
“Depends.”Antonio bumped Declan’s shoulder with his own.“Is that your unfinished business?Jokes?”
“Depends,” the ghost echoed, “If business is open until I get out my share of jokes, will I actually get to finish the tale?”
“In my shoes, Everil would find a river.”Declan leaned into him, and the bond purred with the closeness, the miscatch of gears becoming smooth transition.“For me… well.Comedy in the graveyard, apparently.”
“Only if youattend,Grinning Reaper.And your friend as well.”
Antonio snickered at the nickname.“I’ve seen shows in shittier dives.”
“More the merrier,” the ghost said.“In the conversation, mind, not the graveyard.So,as I had been saying?”
“A gentleman asked a lady atTunbridge,”Declan answered, clearly repeating whatever Antonio had missed.“She’d made a very large acquaintance among all the pretty fellows and beaus there.He asked her what she would do with them all?”
The ghost grinned, her small white teeth glittering in the dark, and picked up the joke from there.“‘Oh!’She said, ‘they pass through like the Waters.’‘And Madam,’ he said, ‘do they allpassthesame Way.’”
And, from the leer in her voice and the expectant look, that was obviously the punchline.Some jokes, you probably had to be at least a century old to get.Luckily, what Antonio lacked in centuries, he made up for in nieces.Laughing along with nonsensical jokes was a survival technique when babysitting.
“You ever hear the one about the leprechaun and the nun?”
“No.”The ghost’s eyes glowed brighter, round cheeks dimpling.“I’m sure I’d remember it if I had.Indulge me?On the off chance I meet up with my husband again.”
“I’ve not heard it either,” Declan added.“Though I’ve suspicions based on the leprechauns I’ve known.”
“Fucking fae,” Antonio said, though the phrase came out fond.He was about to tell a leprechaun joke to a fuckingIrishfae.And a ghost.Fine.Great.But he wasn’t doing the damned accents.“So, these two leprechauns walk into a convent, and they go up to the Mother Superior, and the first one’s laughing the whole time, saying, ‘ask her, ask her.’So the second one, all polite, says ‘Excuse me, Mother Superior, can you tell me how many leprechaun nuns you have in this convent?’and the Mother Superior, she looks down and she says, ‘I’m sorry, my child, but there are no leprechaun nuns in this convent.’”
It was alongjoke.But it was too late not to tell it.And with Declan watching him, he didn’t mind so much, working the question and answer up from the convent to the Holy Roman Empire.
“So, finally, the poor Mother Superior has had enough and she says, ‘For the last time, there are no leprechaun nuns in all of Christendom.Not here, not in the entire world.There arenoleprechaun nuns.’The first leprechaun loses it.All but pisses himself laughing.He points at the second leprechaun, who’s gone all red in the face and says, ‘I told you.You daft bugger!You fucked a penguin!’”
Declan snickered against his shoulder while the ghost giggled behind her hands.The air tasted like flowers left for the dead.And like laughter.
“I think my dear late husband may die from another heart attack, hearing that.Well told, handsome.”The ghost turned on her heel, toward a nearby stone.“Business is closed.I’ve a husband to find.”
One, two, three steps, and she was gone, fading into the second grave, her laughter echoing after.Antonio might have worried, with her disappearing like that.But it was hard to worry with Declan close and a feeling like…
