“Fucking assholes.”Bo scowled, shoving his hands into his pockets.
“Mostly, they’re terrified of him.Gotten worse since Nimai, I think.”
“I don’t fucking doubt it.Having Nimai on the committee probably didn’t help either.Fuck those guys.The fuck are they scared of?Ever says he doesn’t like to do the whole rot thing since it screws up his clothes.”
“Being brutally killed, probably.Doesn’t matter what hewilldo, just what they know he’s capable of.People are like that.”
“I just figure so long as I don’t try to get you kidnapped or treat Ever like Nimai did, Declan’s not going to come for me.Dude gave me the shovel talk day one.”
“Yeah, but you’ve got sense.To them, we’re just rabid dogs off our chains.”
“That’s seriously fucked.”
“Yeah.”He couldn’t help it, the anger in his voice.“I hate it.The way they act around him.Do what I can, but that amounts to jack shit.”
“Can’t think of much a human could do, outside of telling them all to go fuck themselves.Which, if you haven’t, you’ve got a better hold on your tongue than I fucking do.”
“Holding my tongue’s about all I can offer.He builds the bridges and I shut the fuck up.”It all came out flat.The whole world felt flat, these days.“You can tell Everil not to worry.Me and Declan, we’re fine.I’m not gonna run off and break his buddy’s heart.”
Even if he hardly saw Declan, most days.
“If Ever thought you were going to dump him, he’d probably invite Declan over to politely poke at him.”Bo gave a one-armed, jerky shrug.“You don’t want me to tell him things, I won’t.Except like, ‘don’t worry, he’s not about to take on the Monarchs.’I’m just asking after a friend.It sounds pretty fucking miserable.I’mconcerned.”
The silence stretched, broken only by the sound of Antonio’s fingers against iron.He looked past Bo, watching nothing.
It got to him sometimes, the way Bo acted.Like Everil had never threatened to rip Antonio’s throat out while he stood idly by, watching.And all that because Antonio had been ‘concerned.’
“Look, Bo…” he started, only to trail off into silence.Careful.Always.Only time it was safe was when it was just him and Declan, the world shut away.Moments like that were happening less and less.“I can’t– I just left my buddy’s grave.Iwatchedhim die.I don’t got it in me right now, to tell you whatever it is you want to hear.And considering how things go when your buttons get pushed… I’m sorry, but I’d rather not risk it.”
Confusion.Surprise.Realization.Or something like.
“Fuck,” Bo said, glancing back toward the graves.“Brookhaven.You’re right.Sorry.I know I– Temper tantrums aren’t on the menu, whatever we do or don’t say.”
Could Declan feel it, wherever he was?The way the anger flared like a lit match in Antonio's chest, burnt down the wood into nothing.And this was how he moved through Faerie, too.Letting it burn until it burnt out.Sometimes, it felt like a little of himself went with it every time.
“Thanks.But this isn’t about you getting your back up.It’s about what happens when you do.”He tilted his head so he was looking at the sky instead of Bo.“Everil took my name from me.Cursed me to die in water.Christ.I couldn’t give Dulce baths.Couldn’t take the girls to swim class.Because what if just being close to me meant it got them?”The anger was gone and all he felt was tired.“I like you, Bo, but I can’t be real with you.”
Bo said nothing, which was weird enough to drag Antonio’s attention back down.But he couldn’t read Bo like he could Declan.Didn’t know what his soul felt like in anger or in grief.Something spicy, maybe.
“I’m sorry,” Bo said at last.Quiet.“It was fucked.Shouldn’t have happened.Won’t again.”
“Don’t worry about it.”If for no other reason than he just didn’t have the energy to hash it all out now.Past was past.
“I… This a situation where it’s a genuine apology, no explanation, and try to show moving forward I mean it thing, or one where you’d be open to hearing out what happened?Not, like, an excuse.There’s not one.”
You had to forgive people.You had to forgive people because how could you function in a world where you turned against anyone who hurt you?Antonio would have no one left if he hadn’t figured out forgiveness.He’d even forgive Calloway, eventually.
That one would take time.But Bo hadn’t hurt someone Antonio loved.
“Easy, man.Fae are fae.Fuck, people are people.Ones with the power make the ones without toe their line.Explain if you want, but I’m used to it.”He shrugged, shoulders tight.“Didn’t bring it up to rake you over the coals.Just trying to explain why I try to stay on your good side.”
“Didn’t sound like you were.Coal raking.It’s not– If it happened today, I’d be able to say, ‘back off, kelpie, we’re good’ or something like that.”Bo shifted, as restless as Antonio felt.“But back then?Ever didn’t want me.Kept trying to talk me into letting him break our bond.You know how the first days are, yeah?Crawl under each other’s fucking skin.Dude saw my soul and stayed as far the fuck away as he could.
“So, I wasn’t– Didn’t have a reason to believe he’d give a fuck if I told him to back off.Not when he was talking Protocol and fae shit.And yeah, I was pissed.At everyone.”Bo looked down, nudging at the packed dirt with the toe of his sneaker.“I didn’t realize curses existed until he did it.I should’ve said something.But I didn’t.And afterward…” His mouth kicked up in a humorless smile.“Kesk’s fucking white room.A lot of shit before that just kind of blurred over for a long fucking time.So, like, fuck the power thing.Doesn’t matter how true it is, I shouldn’t have let it be then.Shouldn’t have let something happen to you that has you trying for my good side.”
Antonio let the man talk.Ramble.Couldn’t imagine what it’d have been like if Declan’d pushed him away that first night, instead of falling into his arms.Even still, he’d like to think he would’ve brought the sluagh up short if he’d gone after some dumb human just trying to help.
He wasn’t Bo.And Declan wasn’t Everil.
