“My parents asked me to come home this weekend, and I wanted to see you before I went.”
“Why—”
“Because,” he said simply, and stepped into the house.
Rachel stood there, the smile that had bloomed when she’d opened the door to Andrew threatening to slide off her face. She felt way too emotional for this moment.
Andrew frowned at her. “Rachel? Are you okay?”
“Yes. No. I don’t know.” She let out a strangled laugh, and then, to her horror, she felt tears start in her eyes. Too many tears to blink back; they spilled down her cheeks before she could keep herself from it, and she turned away, burning with embarrassment. “You must think I’m a nutter. I’ll be all right in a sec....” She wiped her palms across her cheeks, trying to will the tears back, but it was too late for that.
Then she felt Andrew’s hands on her shoulders as he turned her gently around to face him and brought her into the comforting embrace of his arms. Which only made it harder to get herself together.
“What happened?”
“Everything.” She could barely get the word out. “Lily’s not going to Durham and Claire’s leaving and I’m a bitch.” Shelet out a hiccuppy half laugh, half sob. “Everything’s wrong, Andrew.”
“Let’s take one thing at a time.” He steered her into the sitting room and then sat on the sofa and pulled her onto his lap.
“I’m not really a lap sitter,” Rachel mumbled, and Andrew chuckled softly and shifted so she was sitting next to him, his arm around her, her head tucked against his shoulder.
“That better?”
“Yes.”
“So what happened with Lily?”
Briefly Rachel told him, and he listened without speaking. Finally he said, “I know it’s disappointing.”
“But,” Rachel cut across him. “I know. It’s her life. I was pushing the whole thing on her. I do realize that. I knew it all along, I guess, but it was such an opportunity.”
“Knowing something doesn’t make it any less disappointing.”
“No.” Rachel sniffed. The tears had thankfully stopped, although her face was no doubt blotchy and puffy from crying. Just the way she wanted Andrew to see her.
“And Claire?” Andrew asked.
“She’s going to London to take up some pretentious job with a charity.”
“Arranged by my parents, no doubt.”
“Yes.”
“Did she seem happy about that?”
“Happy?” Rachel paused, considering. “No, not exactly. But she seemed like she was going to do it. And I’d actually texted her, asking her to go into the housekeeping business with me, so I could have time to do a part-time course at Lancaster.” She felt her eyes fill again, but this time she could blink the tears back. “I’m not dependent on Claire. I realize that, but...” Her voice wobbled, and then she started to squeak. “It’s just that everybody leaves.”
“Everybody?” Andrew asked gently. “Or just your dad?”
The simple question felled her. The tears came again, worse this time, and she buried her face in fistfuls of Andrew’s shirt as her shoulders shook. “I miss him,” she gasped out, a confession she’d never made to anyone, not even to herself. “I don’t want to. I hate that I do, but I do.”
“Of course you do,” Andrew said. He was stroking her back and her hair, and for a few seconds, in his arms, she felt incredibly safe.
Finally she eased back, embarrassed again by how much she’d lost it. “Sorry...”
“Oh, Rachel.” Andrew touched her chin with his forefinger. “You’ve had a pretty raw deal in life, haven’t you?”
“So I’m not the only one who thinks my life sucks?” Rachel managed to quip, and Andrew grimaced.
