Lucy glanced at the two girls, who were listening with avid, openmouthed interest. She’d wanted to have this conversation with Alex in private, but it looked like that wasn’t going to happen. “Going back to Boston. Realizing it wasn’t home anymore—”
“I thought you’d already realized that.”
He wasn’t making this easy for her. “Didn’t you get my message on your machine?” Lucy asked, torn between exasperation and fear. “I sent it nearly a week ago—”
“A message?” Alex frowned. “I never check the answering machine. I really only use my mobile.”
“Oh, perfect.”
“What was in your message?”
“Well.” The things she’d blurted on the answering machine were far harder to say to his face. But maybe she needed to dothis, for her sake as well as Alex’s. “I’ll recap for you. I told you that I was sorry for leaving the way I did, and that I missed you and Poppy and Bella. And that I didn’t want to be on a hiatus.”
“What’s a hiatus?” Poppy asked.
“Something not good,” Bella answered.
“Anything else in this message?” Alex asked.
“Well, I said that I cared about you, and that I thought you had a nasal drip—”
Bella let out a choked laugh. “Seriously? A nasal drip? Gross.”
“That was before I met you,” Lucy said quickly. “Of course.”
“Of course.” She could see Alex’s mouth was quirking up in that lovely little smile she knew so well.
“So I said all those things and then I came back because this is where I want to be.” She glanced at the girls, whose gazes darted between her and Alex. “Right here,” she clarified, “is where I want to be. If you want me to be here.”
Alex didn’t say anything and Bella let out a sigh of such utter exasperation that Lucy nearly laughed. “Dad, you’re not seriously thinking of turning her down? Because if you are, you’re a first-class idiot.”
“You really are, Daddy,” Poppy chimed in, and then Lucy did laugh.
Alex’s small smile disappeared as his mouth firmed in a line. His arms were still folded. Lucy braced herself. “Well,” he said slowly, “I can’t be an idiot.”
She laughed again as she nearly sagged with relief and Alex reached out one hand and tugged her towards him. She went gladly, pressed her cheek against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on top of her head.
“Finally,” Bella said, and Poppy let out a cheer.
Lucy waved them forward. “Group hug,” she said, and Poppy came first, hurtling herself towards Alex’s midsection. Bella dragged her feet a little, but she leaned into her dad as he put anarm around her and they stayed there for a minute, the four of them.
Lucy spent the evening with them all, but left before nine, knowing Alex had to get the girls to bed. Knowing too that they would be taking it slow, no matter how serious their intentions.
Still, she and Alex were able to sneak away from Poppy and Bella for a little while, when the girls went upstairs to watch TV; they sat on the sofa and kissed until Lucy’s lips felt as if they were buzzing. Eventually, reluctantly, Alex pulled away.
“I need to tell you some things,” he said.
Lucy’s heart lurched a little at his serious tone. “Okay,” she said.
Alex shifted in his seat and her heart lurched again as she wondered just what he had to say. “I reacted badly to your leaving in part because of my history. My history with Anna.” Lucy didn’t answer; she wasn’t sure what to say, and in any case Alex continued. “I told you before that we weren’t happy here in the village. Anna didn’t want to be here, and I wanted to pretend I couldn’t see that. The day she died . . .” He hesitated, and Lucy waited. “That day, before she went riding, she told me she was leaving. For good. I was angry and surprised, even though I suppose I shouldn’t have been. Anyway, when you left, even though it was just for a little while . . . it brought back some hard memories, and I reacted badly. I’m sorry.”
“Oh, Alex.” Lucy swallowed. “I’m sorry. Sorry that I put you in that position.” She wanted to ask about a million questions but wasn’t sure she wanted to hear all the answers about Alex’s marriage. “Do the girls know?” she finally asked. “That she was going to leave?”
Alex shook his head. “No, I never told them, and I never will. It wouldn’t do any good.”
“No, it wouldn’t,” she agreed, but she could certainly understand Alex’s perspective a lot better now. He smiled then and tugged her by the hand.
“Come back here,” he said, and kissed her again.
