“And how was your time?” she asked after a moment. “Your friend seemed nice.”
“He is. He is far nicer than me. We enjoyed ourselves, and the discussion went well enough. I actually think it will benefit us, as it is about grants for farmers.”
“Ah, so we can help your tenant!”
“Precisely.”
“How wonderful! We can tell him that, and then he will not feel so bad about accepting help from us. It is a shame that your friend does not wish to marry, if he is such a nice man.”
“I have told him that, but he always says that he has yet to find a lady that he likes enough to spend the rest of his life with. When that day comes, he will have no choice. He will be fine once he is married, of that I am certain.”
The words were on the tip of her tongue, and though Adelaide wanted to swallow them, she could not help herself. She was toocurious about him, too eager to know more about the man she had married.
“And what of you?” she asked. “How do you feel, now that you are married?”
She did not know what she wanted him to say, as long as he did not say that everything was worse. She could not think of any reason why he would claim to be far happier, but he had to be aware that he was better off with her.
“The same,” he replied bluntly.
Those two words struck her like a blow.
She hated that he had so much power over her. She was not supposed to care what he thought, but she did. He was her husband, and his opinion of her mattered.
“I see,” she muttered.
“That is through no fault of your own, of course. All I mean is that my life has hardly changed. My mother remains in charge, I hardly do anything in my home, and I come and go as I please, as always.”
“So our marriage means nothing to you.”
“No, I—Adelaide, do not be like this. I told you what our marriage would be, and you chose to marry me anyway. I cannot give you the love and affection you expect. We made a sensible decision, and that is all that this will ever be.”
“I know.”
But she did not like it. She had been more than happy to accept his proposal when it was all she could do to escape Hargrave, but it was more than that.
She liked to look upon Cassian, to speak with him. She wanted to know more about him, but every time they made progress, he would push her away. She hated it, but there was nothing she could do.
He was right; she had known what she was getting into, and he was under no obligation to change his mind.
She stared out the window for the rest of the ride.
She did not take his arm when they exited the carriage.
CHAPTER 17
“You are already making her unhappy.”
Cassian groaned as they entered the house. His mother had watched as Adelaide made straight for the stairs, taking them two at a time, while he lingered in the hallway.
“I do not want this, Mother.”
“This conversation, or this marriage?”
“This,” he repeated, gesturing to her. “It has been a long day, and I do not have time to listen to you.”
“How lovely. Is that any way to speak to your own mother!”
“Do you have anything of note to say?”
