‘Well, I do. Something about that man scares me.’
Cullen spat blood from his mouth. After a while, Lowri said, ‘Are you well now?’
‘Aye, better.’
‘So you can answer me this. How does Butcher know about our arrangement, Cullen, about me needing a bairn in my belly to free my friends?’
Cullen straightened up. He had expected this, but still, it irritated him. ‘My father must have told him.’
‘Why would he?’
‘Because Butcher’s father and mine were friends years ago. That is why I was sent to Ireland as a lad when my father could not stand the sight of me. I came to Larne to learn the smuggling trade. I know that Butcher still talks to my father now and then.’
‘You kept this from me.’ Lowri shook her head. ‘So now everyone knows my shame, my degradation, that I am nothing more than a brood mare for the Macaulays. No wonder he tried to talk me into his bed. Why would he not, when I am clearly for sale, a slave to take to bed whenever you please?’
Cullen grabbed Lowri and shook her. ‘You are not a slave to me or anyone, nor will you ever be.’
‘I don’t believe you.’
‘Believe this then. If you want Butcher, as most lasses do, then go to him. I’ll not stop you.’ The words were acid in this throat. The thought of her lying with Butcher, her pale skin pressed to his, her dark hair falling over his smug, handsome face, had Cullen writhing in jealousy.
‘He said he can free my friends any time he likes,’ she spat.
‘Butcher might be able to force their release, because my father is frightened of him. He’s a mad bastard, that one. It’s your choice, but he will extract a high price for his help. Trust me on that, lass.’
Silence fell between them, and Cullen held his breath.
‘I don’t prefer him,’ she said, looking him in the eye.
‘Good.’ Cullen took Lowri’s hand and led her away from the tavern.
‘Where are we going?’
‘I have some anger to walk off.’
Cullen could not speak again until they had walked a good way from the tavern and reached a little kirk perched atop a hill overlooking Larne. The sound of the tavern was torn away by the wind, and the sea looked silver in the moonlight, its roar gentler than usual. Cullen rubbed his thumb into his palm. Lowri looked miserable, and he couldn’t blame her.
‘Am I in danger, Cullen, from Butcher?’
‘Aye. That is why I should not have brought you here to Ireland.’ He bit his lip, feeling the full extent of his folly. ‘I thought you would get with child quickly, God knows, I have tried, and I like trying.’ He smiled at Lowri, but she didn’t smile back. ‘I meant it when I said I would set you free, for I’ve no wish to cage you in this marriage.’
‘Maybe I am barren,’ she said quietly.
‘Or perhaps I do not please you abed, lass. Maybe your misery makes your womb wither.’
‘You know you please me abed, Cullen.’
‘Butcher might be a better bet. He is very wealthy. He might enjoy the company of cutthroats, but he has houses all over Ireland, coin too, well hidden. And he is handsome. Though once he gets what he wants, he will discard you, for he bores easily. Lasses are nothing to him. They never touch his heart. But if you want him then…’
Lowri took hold of his arm. ‘I don’t want him. I want you.’
Cullen gave a bitter laugh and shook his head. ‘If you were free, you would leave me.’
She did not reply, and Cullen’s heart sank. ‘I don’t know that I would,’ said Lowri, and it bounced back up.
‘What are you saying?’
‘I don’t rightly know. It’s just that I want you, Cullen. Only you.’
